I like football. There. I’ve said it. I’ve ’come out’ as a football… fan-cier. A devotee. A worshipper at the alter of the Premier League. Who, ironically in the light of this metaphor, have shown themselves to be as godless as any organisation can be, as deducting 10 points from Everton was purely the work – Read More-
What did we ever do before ‘WhatsApp groups’ were invented? What was our meaning in life? And that of our forebears? It was all meaningless. Pointless. But we all had way more time on our hands. But they can be fun. Well, for me they can be fun. For others probably ‘really annoying’ and ‘stupid’ – Read More-
“We must stop obesity!!!”, cried Rishi Sunak, as half the kids in our fine nation waddle to school with a satchel, a separate lunch-wheelbarrow and a BMI of 46. And why does our PM wish to take an interest in this? Particularly as his kids are stick thin? Is it for the health benefits of – Read More-
There was never a doubt in my mind about yesterday’s game. I was brimming with confidence, I was cool and calm and relaxed in my confidence in team and especially, in our manager. (Any impressions given yesterday to the contrary were typos). Because ‘in Ange we trust’. Oh. My. God. But do we trust. Even – Read More-
I’m writing this at 5.40 in the afternoon. Just after the restart of the Spurs match at Manchester City. Because my sense of impending doom, of foreboding, my sense that all is not quite right in the world, is massive. And is definitely not improved by watching the tv. In fact, it’s quite depressing. We’re – Read More-
I’m not sure what amuses me more; holding the COP 28 global warming summit in Dubai, or having the UN Human Rights convention in Iran. It’s like having a Love and Peace weekend in Millwall. Or a Michelin Star Meeting in McDonalds. A Stamp Out Money Laundering campaign at the Etihad. A World Transparency Event – Read More-
Things change. Evolve. Metamorphosise. Its the nature of things. We used to have the dreaded Lyme’s Disease. Get bitten by a tic and you’ll suffer, bit like flu, bit of pain, and up to 6 months when you might have difficulty thinking. Which is why the condition evolved into Lime’s Disease. In which this lack – Read More-
Last night I had the (thankfully) rare priviledge of putting Lila and Joey to bed. It wasn’t the plan. I was coming round so mum could pop out for an hour, after bedtime. She didn’t tell them because they’d get excited. Not because they’re seeing me, no one wants that, but because I would be – Read More-
Is there anyone in the entire fucking world, other than Rishi Sunak and Kyriakos Mitsotakis (Greek PM) who really gives a shit about the Elgin Marbles? Or the Parthenon Porcelain or the Crumbling Concrete, or whatever you choose to call them? Because I don’t. But, I really don’t. And I have seen them. You can’t – Read More-
I don’t read the Daily Telegraph. Because I don’t wear a tie. Haven’t worn one since the elder daughter was married, 10 years ago. Might do a black tie if absolutely pressed, but it’ll stay on for the first 7 minutes only before I rip it off, gagging for breath. But you need to wear – Read More-