There’s big talk about concerning the ‘triple lock!!!’ on MY pension. Yes, I am a pensioner and thus get paid by the state, have incontinence issues, dribble down my shirt and walk round in circles talking about Rommel’s attack in Tunisia. Its what we do. And we do all that shit because we can afford – Read More-
I am dentally challenged. Always have been. ‘Special’ in the teeth department. For the first year of my life I had no dental problems at all. It was after that it all started. And continued pretty much my entire life. Fillings, abscesses, extractions, crowns, my mouth is barely my own any longer, so full of – Read More-
Let’s face it, no-one wants a bunch of convicted criminals running round the streets. If we did, we’d move to Russia. Or Peckham. And yet when a prisoner actually escapes from prison, we’re instantly engaged and in admiration for the act. Because everyone appreciates that getting out of prison is not very easy. That’s, almost, – Read More-
There’s no football. It has been decreed that: just as the new football season gets properly under way and the old excitements, hopes and… ok, anxieties return anew, they stop everything for ‘international breaks’. Those great games of absolutely no interest whatsoever to anyone which give our star players and bestest idols an extra chance – Read More-
I’ve been promoted. In, like, a really short time, just a couple weeks, really, I’ve been elevated from The Bastard Cyclist from Hell!!! to fully-fledged ‘Terrorist’. And I started with such good intentions… The problem is that riding electric bikes is totally addictive. Riding normal bikes is probably almost as good, but with more sweat – Read More-
Britain is broken! It’s not working. Needs a fix. Several fixes. Thus spake Kier Starmer (zzzzzz) and several of his cohorts, politicising every disaster confronting the country. Which is his job. And would appear to be the job to which he’s best suited, as he wasn’t much of a lawyer and his time as ‘shadow – Read More-
So we all have a bit of a giggle about Spain and its appalling standards of equalitiness because it’s fun to take the piss. Particularly as not many speak English properly so they’re not aware of all the insults and derisory comments being levelled at them. Si? And then on Friday I happened to be – Read More-
In 1837, my ancestor, Shlomo-ben-Yaarnkel ha-Cohen, was walking the streets of Szypliszki and he was depressed. For most Jews depression is the default position, expressed with a big ‘oooyyyy’, but for Shlomo this was more defined. He was poor. Not just, like boat-person refugee poor, not like homeless-in-Britain poor, not even ‘how am I ever – Read More-
Have you had the ‘red light debate’ at a dinner party in a middle-class suburb near you? It goes like this: “well I saw cyclists today and they went straight through A RED LIGHT!!!, on their bikes, as if the rules don’t apply to them!!!”. Then everyone agrees whilst sipping chilled rose, and they get – Read More-
There can surely be few pleasures in life greater than high pressure hosing your driveway. Its right up there with wetting the bed (first 2.3 minutes only), not falling off a ladder and watching Arsenal lose to… anyone. The satisfaction achieved as the stones just glisten brightly, the joy of being soaked to the point – Read More-