People who use electronic cigarette devices are called ‘vapers’. They ‘vape’. They don’t smoke. Because instead of noxious shit and tar and dead leaves and stuff, WE now instead inhale our nicotine in a harmless… stuff. In fact not just harmless but I’d say totally beneficial to the vaper and all those around him. I – Read More-
There are currently 650 electoral constituencies in the UK. Of which 59 are in Scotland. About, say, 9%. And if Scotland buggers off (‘devolves’) then those constituencies will simply cease to be any part of our political system. And if you work on the assumption that, since Mel Gibson wiped the blue paint of his – Read More-
I have but one question regarding the now seemingly distinct possibility that Scotland may gain the independence it (or some of it) desires. And its not a question about currency. Nor how long the North Sea oil will last (Alex Salmond says “almost forever”, people in the oil biz say “about 3 weeks”), nor whether – Read More-
There’s a bit in Monty Python’s Life of Brian where a man explains that he is no longer the leader of Popular People’s Christian Front, they were disbanded and replaced by the Popular Christian People’s Front, not to be confused with the Popular Front for Christain Peoples, who are a right bunch’a tossers… And where – Read More-
I wish this was news but sadly the phrase: ‘the England football team is shit’ is older than my children, who are only in their 20s. They’ve been shit since Bobby Charlton retired. Since Bobby Moore died. Since Jimmy Greaves left the game to get a new liver. And no-one knows why. No-one can work – Read More-
Hell hath no fury like a French tart scorned; so the saying goes. So if you add the total fury of all the Dantean levels of hell to the natural bitchiness of a pretty normal Parisienne, you end up with Valerie Trierweiller’s new book. Called ‘merci pour ce moment’. Its basically an attack on her – Read More-
Saturday morning, left home early, really early, 7.30 flight from Luton to Montpellier. Picked up by our lovely mates, straight to the beach, lying in the sun before 11. Fantastic. Short journeys, European trips, even with Easyjet, the only airline to fly into Montpellier now from London, but heh; it was all plain sailing. Even – Read More-
The good thing about France, other than the women, the food and the sunshine, is that it takes your mind wonderfully off all the awful things happening in the world. I read the Times but its not the same as when at home when all the horrors seem to be a constant. Over here they’re – Read More-
There’s an old joke. Goes like this: so God made all the countries and as he was naming them he said, ‘well this country really does have it all. Its big, its beautiful, wonderfully fertile, has the Alps, the Pyrenees, hundreds of miles of stunning coastline and amazing (even by my standards, not willing to – Read More-
Do you go to a gym? You know, one of those places filled with mirrors depicting depressed and strained fat bastards, red-faced and half a squat away from a hernia? Gym. You know. Well I don’t. I’ll keep my 125 quid a month to spend on dirty burgers and beer, thank you very much. Ok, – Read More-