I love America. I guess (horrible Americanism) I always have. I fell in love with Westerns as a kid, then always wanted the ‘GI Joe’ over the British Action Man, drooled over adverts for ‘chupa chops’ in DC comics, even though I had no idea what they were and with hindsight, if they were as – Read More-
Some people (you know who you are!!!) don’t eat bread. They find it too… bread-like, too… carby, too… just too… something. These people are silly. Bread is wonderful, bread is delightful, bread is the best. And don’t get me started on what you can put in/on/around/between it. Yet there’s bread and there’s bread. Paul Hollywood – Read More-
Iss a funny ole thing, this coronavirus. It’s made me ‘preciate much more luvverly shit than wot I used ta. Cos naah the pubs ‘ave shut, I have to walk abart a bit. Somefink I’d previously avoided like the fucking plague. Ironic that, innit? Now we ‘ave a fucking plague and I’m getting all naycherred – Read More-
Here’s my day. Wake up at 11.45. Doze for another hour whilst everyone makes me tea. Read the papers. Which is basically reading about coronavirus. How many died here, there, everywhere. Looking at graphs. Lots of graphs. London rise vs Manchester. England vs Italy. Spain vs France. Deaths in Zimbabwe against cases in New York. – Read More-
So you’re walking along, all cazule like, say, Fleet Street, at about midnight. You’re in a ‘lockdown’ so shouldn’t really be out, but you’re so pissed/stoned/insane/unbalanced that you’re barely aware of any of that shit. And suddenly, you get the urge to acquire a new pair of RayBans. Even though its the dark of night. – Read More-
There’s a view of coronavirus that ain’t nice, ain’t pleasant but is definitely valid. That it is culling the weak, the infirm, the aged, the sick, from the world. Because although others are affected, by a massive margin, the ‘high risks’ count for a humongous proportion of the actual deaths. Which is why there are – Read More-
Do you remember when we had ‘days’? Those things that, sort of held a significance of their own. Bridge on Wednesdays, tennis on Saturdays, chopped liver on Fridays, Lila on Thursdays… Now we just have… days. All the same. As different as you want to make them. Within constraints. Mainly, you can’t go anywhere, do – Read More-
Carlsberg don’t make really annoying things. But if they did they’d make a leaf-blower. Those devil-inspired peace-disturbing muthafuckas that fire up at exactly 1 second past 8 o’clock, the time her majesty’s government allows such an awful fucking din to commence and upset the entire neighbourhood. As 57 gardeners stand there with their hands on – Read More-
Tomorrow is Passover. The celebration of the Jews leaving Egypt. In a plague. Ok, ten plagues. I mean, we’ve only got one and we’re not coping very well. But ten? TEN??? So the festival of Passover means that we have to tell ‘the story’. And because its a Jewish story it goes on and on. – Read More-
So because of Coronavirus, the tv companies are making a bit more effort. They won’t make up for football, can’t, wouldn’t, couldn’t, mustn’t, but they can up their game a bit as their viewing market just multiplied itself by thousands at the government’s behest. And so, just a few days after Witness came on, there – Read More-