So the phone rings in the room. I pick it up (like what else??) and a voice says, in a very strong, Indian accent: “is that Andrew Convay?” Which, other than the regional mispronunciation (I struggle with Murgh Meganhi), is my given name. But the only people who ever use it are my mother, and – Read More-
We’re going to India today. I spend so much time speaking to call centres in Mumbai and Delhi that I thought it almost rude not to go and thank ‘Kenny’ and ‘Mike’ and ‘Ronnie’ personally for disturbing so much of our meal-time peace during the course of the year. I’m taking a baseball bat with – Read More-
Well, Ankara hasn’t been nuked. Yet. You can never rule out the possibility altogether, but strange things are happening. Calculated but strange in the aftermath of the assassination of the Russian ambassador to Turkey. Putin and Erdogan are singing from the same song sheet. Allied against ‘terror’ and ‘terrorists’ like never before. Ok, you can’t – Read More-
On a scale of 1 to 7.5, rate each of these things for stupidity, with ‘1’ being ‘actually quite sensible really’ and 7.5 being ‘ARE YOU FUCKING MENTAL????’ Goddit? Playing tennis with a dodgy shoulder when everyone’s told you not to. Losing 2-1 to Manchester City after being a goal to the good. Having a – Read More-
Read a very interesting yet odd article the other day by the Vatican’s Chief Astronomer. Can’t remember his name but it sounded a bit like a pasta dish. Who knew that the Vatican had astronomers? Yet they do. They’re into science. Apparently. And this dude was trying to find an explanation for the Star of – Read More-
So Mezud Ozil and Alexis Sanchez are in deep talks with Arsenal about their new contracts. Which they don’t give a shit about. And the money on offer, which they really, really do. They earn 140k a week (a fucking WEEK!!!!) but want 250k. Like Pogba. Fine. Then Oscar, Brazilian not-quite-superstar-enough to play regularly for – Read More-
Thursday. We’re off. India. Land a million curries. A billion people. 42,000 known forms of stomach upset. 1200 Hindu Gods. With 92000 limbs between them. And lots of curries. Did I mention those already? Good. I love curry. But that always supposes we take off from Heathrow. The weather’s nothing special, no ice, no snow, – Read More-
They’ve finally ‘liberated’ Aleppo. Hooray. The good guys marched in and outed the bad guys and they’ll all live happily ever after. That can only be good news. But for whom? Well its good news for Assad, because he gets his country back. What’s left of it. And its good news for Russia, because they’ve – Read More-
Its a funny ole game, is football. Jimmy Greaves words, set in stone, the foundation block of the apparently random and capricious nature of football. Any team can beat any team; on the day. Anything can happen. As they often do. Shitty teams beat high flyers, top teams fail to finish things off, last minute, – Read More-
Don’t know if you realise but Christmas is fast approaching. If the endless ads on tv didn’t alert you to this, nor the lights on every street, nor the 7 miles queues for every shopping centre in the land, then that’s just because you’re either stupid or, like me, in denial. But you can only – Read More-