After the feast comes the famine. And I’m not referring to my first few days of not having Cornish Cream Teas. Issa metaphor, innit. And it refers to the first day when suddenly, there’s no sport to watch. Yesterday. Black Monday. Tennis is finished, footballers resting. All that happened was about 200 men in lycra – Read More-
Those damned Yanks. Not a clue between them. They come to London, go and watch Martin Freeman in Richard III at the theatre and once he’s done his ‘now is the winter of our discontent…’ soliloque, they clap. Applaud!!!! At a theatre!! Which is shameful and not what we do over here. And for good – Read More-
So that was Cornwall, Devon and the entire south west of England. Stunning, sunny (in the most part) and fab. Today I’m in Norfolk. As East as you can go without falling off the edge into the North Sea. In fact I’m writing this on the 10.15 from Kings Cross to Kings Lynn (I only – Read More-
So there you are, in Cornwall, having a seasiderful great time, and its hot and sunny and everything you could dream of that doesn’t come on a plate with either chips or clotted cream. And you’re happy as can be. And then you wake up in the morning and… …and its pissing down with rain. – Read More-
we left St Austell, on the south coast of Cornwall, with some degree of sadness, though that lasted til the sun came out and we hit some really fab roads heading towards North Cornwall. And Padstow. The most lovely, quaint, pretty, picturesque little fishing village in the world. Well, in this part of the world – Read More-
Went to the Eden Project yesterday. What a fab… er… thing, that is. Its all, kind’of, eco-bubbles set out in a former clay pit in deepest darkest (or brightest, as it turned out, being about 120 degrees here yesterday) Cornwall. They’ve made an Amazonian rainforest, under immense plastic bubbles, and its like being in Brazil, – Read More-
So here we are in Cornwall. First English summer holiday for 50 years. First time I’ve ever been to Cornwall and Devon. And its bloody wonderful. Though fucking exhausting. There’s so much to do in England. All other countries offer endless sunshine and footballers who dive a lot. England has sooooo much to offer the – Read More-
When I was a kid we didn’t ‘go on holidays’. We ‘went to the seaside’. Small difference but concpetually world’s apart. The whole world apart in fact because ‘the seaside’ was in England. You could probably find one in Wales, even Scotland. But the real one was in the south of England. No-one accused me – Read More-
“They’ve treated Luis like a dog!!!!” said his grandma yesterday after the ban was imposed on her sweet little grandson. Well, actually, Mrs Suarez, they haven’t. Dogs that bite get shot. I was going to tell her that revelation myself but I couldn’t find the Spanish for ‘buck-toothed shit-for-brains nob’. I hope Barcelona are very – Read More-
Do you know the word peony? If you do then, according to a survey, you are 96% more likely to be female. If you’re a man and you know a peony, you’re probably gay, even if you haven’t realised it yet. Or a heterosexual florist. I know what a peony is because I’m a totally – Read More-