“Chelsea don’t harbour divers.” Thus spake Jose Morinho, everyone’s favourite Portuguezer now that poor (not very) old Eusebio has gone to play in the great stadium in the sky. Odd then, that sixteen Chelsa players have been booked in the last 3 games for ‘simulation’. I think the problem is that players in general but – Read More-
I love sports. But hate exercise. In that I like doing things that involve others in a sporting situation but doing it on my own is like some form of mastubatory unfulfilment. I think its the trash talk I miss. I find it most unrewarding to sit in front of the mirrors at the gym – Read More-
I’m going to Denver. Colorado just this week legalised the use of cannabis for ‘recreational use’. Like 4 x 4 driving in the mountains; you can now do it stoned out of your box. Or deep-sea diving, marlin fishing, sailing or skiing. All recreations now to be greatly enhanced by smoking dope. Though good luck – Read More-
If you’re going on a nudist holiday, what do you pack in your suitcase? The answer is: suncream. Loads of suncream. Very powerful, factor 250, viagra flavoured suncream. When you walk along our beach here to the eastern (or possibly western, I have no idea, no clue and absolutely no desire to find out) extreme, – Read More-
How is it a ‘tropical paradise’ if you can’t get Sky Sports 1?? You can eat as many meals as you like, drink all the Mai Tais and Mojitos, walk as many beers along the beach as your heart desires (not sure incessant beer-drinking when already 14 stone overweight is good for your heart anyway: – Read More-
Men are brave. Right?? I mean, if we gave birth we’d do it in the pub whilst playing darts. Or at White Hart Lane on match-day. Right?? No, probably not. Men are ‘brave’ but mainly only in really stupid ways that run so contrary to any form of common sense that you could replace ‘brave’ – Read More-