Well ‘Europe’, that club to which we once belonged, but will soon depart, is good for lots of things. They’re very good at speaking foreign languages. French, Spanish, German, all spoken really well over there. The wine’s good in France, olive oil in Italy, sausages in Germany. They’re pretty good at football too. Spain in – Read More-
This’ll shock you: men’s and women’s brains are different. Who’d’a thought? That’s why men are so much better at football, the obvious benchmark for high level cerebral activity. Along with throwing, parallel parking and the inability to iron a shirt without burning it. And scratching your testicles. So for years they’ve been performing tests on – Read More-
Manchester United have made their worst start to a football season since 1989!!!! Oh. My. God. That’s awful!! How could the Gods of football conspire in such a brutal, hard, cold way as to take away their divine right to success? How is it that the ‘biggest club in the world’ should suffer the tragic – Read More-
Is there a correlation between football and alcohol? This is the question on everyone’s mind, lips and… errr… livers. So it needs exploration. Not the bit about Gazza having seven litres of pure spirit poured down his throat whilst he was tied to a chair with his head held back, that’s normal. Nor Rooney going – Read More-
I love the ‘far right’. As long as, politically speaking, its on the periphery, it creates a wonderful environment for the violent, the stupid, the stupidly violent and the violently stupid. Its basically politics for those who like fighting. Always has been. From Hitler who indoctrinated a group of moronic thugs (and find me any – Read More-
In a brilliant move, based on solid maffematics, old Chancellor, George Osborne, raised the rate of ‘stamp duty’, the tax you have to pay when you buy a house. Its a basic kind of tax: you’re spending money, we want some. Goes back to Robin Hood days. Its maffia-esque. A deal is being done, by – Read More-
This has been a memorable year, thus far. I know, its a bit early for that ‘week after Christmas summary of the year past’ but that’s where I am. David Bowie died, then Brexit happened, well, Brexit started and we’re watching that space, next came Trump and then finally, the biggest tragedy of all, the – Read More-
…Britannia rules the waves… (all join in!). Nothing like a rousing song to start the day. I feel better now. Until I look and see that us wave-ruling, sea-faring Brits have a navy comprising merely 19 ships. No aircraft carriers, no… big things with nuclear shit, just 19 paltry vessels. Destroyers and Frigates. Which, presumably, – Read More-
I’m going into the travel advice business. I’m qualified; I been lots’a places. ‘Merica. ‘Stralia. Whitby. Barking. And when asked, say, about the ‘best way to get to Yorkshire’, I’ll answer; DON’T!!!!!! For fuck sake just stay home. Spring clean. Clip the budgie’s claws. Shred last year’s bank statements. Watch telly. Just DON’T GO TO – Read More-
Due to the latest in a long line of what the medical world terms: shoulder fuckage, I haven’t been allowed to resume my tennis habit. Which is a bummer. I love my tennis. Its my ‘thing’. I don’t gym (I’d rather grow obese gracelessly, with a chocolate eclair in each hand), I don’t swim, I – Read More-