Don’t get me wrong: I love the Beatles. John Cooper Clarke is a very clever man. I adore Jodie Comer from Killing Eve. But there’s something about Liverpudlians… They can be very demanding. They have a sense of entitlement which creates the necessity to whinge a lot, which accounts for the accent, which is essentially, – Read More-
So this is what’s happening: the North of England is to be closed due to Covid. Of, course, this will be in ‘localised areas’ but basically, from Northampton upwards, its shut. The people of Bolton and Blackburn and Wigan, all of whom support third rate football teams, are already in a kind of ‘mini lockdown’ – Read More-
Isn’t Amazon just the best company in the world? Like, you, just, kind’a, order shit, and, like, it just fucking arrives! Like, geezer in a white van brings it round, like, 20 minutes before you ordered it! Amazing. That’s why they call it ‘amazon’, cos its like ‘amazin’, innit? And, my Kindle, right? It’s got, – Read More-
This is a wonderful photo. A metaphor for declining standards in the world, a potent symbol. And nothing is more potent than 2 Barbie dolls. Ok, one Barbie and one Sindy, if you’re that pedantic and anal about such things. The Sindy on the right is Mel’s poor, wretched, doll, whose hair was cut off – Read More-
I keep reading articles about hugging. Not shagging, they’re different ‘articles’. But hugging. Cuddling. In fact about touching. And how this is not just part of the human condition, this need for touch, but an essentially defining feature. If we were dogs we’d sniff arses, but we’re not, well, I’m not, we’re humans. Well, we – Read More-
There’s now 3 questions to ask people to reduce viral risk. “Do you have a cough?” “Is your temperature high?” And, “have you been involved in any goalless draws this week?” Because if there’s one positive (other than Trump’s test) to be taken from this horrible pandemic, its the amazing effect its had on football. – Read More-
As the world prays for Donald Trump and his deliverance from the dreaded disease that he actually didn’t even believe in until last Tuesday, we need, as always with the world’s slipperiest dickhead, to question a few ‘facts’. Well, ‘facts’ can only get you so far, and they’re always questionable anyway when coming out of – Read More-
Lila laughed at the idea that she was ‘a white girl’. She’s not white. She’s pink. If only the whole world saw such issues through the prism of 3 (and a half) year old literalism and without the baggage of nuance and context and (mainly bad) experience. But then Prince Harry would have nothing to – Read More-
Before I move onto to the important matters occurring at White Hart Lane yesterday evening, I wish to take a moment to explain to you the latest rules regarding the new, non-lockdown-but-not-far-from-it, status in some-but-not-all areas, with possible amendments to the rules of adjacent towns and cities. Not forgetting the countryside and the inhabitants thereof. – Read More-
I was looking at the Sunday magazines the other day. Probably Sunday. And I’m always drawn to images of food. And the photos all look fab, but then you read the recipes and I can’t help thinking that there is a fundamental issue with the whole genre. That there are only so many foods and – Read More-