I’ve said it for years. Though mainly to Mel. And mainly on holiday. I’ve said: HOW MUCH FUCKING BOTTLED WATER DO WE NEED???? Because she worries about dehydration. In Scotland. Where the risk of dehydration is seven hundred and ninety-six thousand times lower than the risk of drowning. But water we buy. And worry about – Read More-
Jon Snow, the veteran news broadcaster has found himself(ie) in deep doo-doo. He was photographed in the deep other-doo-doo that is the mud at Glastonbury with bunches of kids, all having fun and frolics in wonderfully high spirits. And Jon was joining in a rousing chorus of ‘fuck the tories, da-dee da-dum, dee-whatever’. Oh no! – Read More-
How’s this for scary. For thousands of years people had found great big, almost perfectly triangular white stones, about the size of a hand, and not known from whence they came. Speculation went with the times. They’re petrified tongues of dragons, they’re from the moon, God done it, usual stuff. But what they in fact – Read More-
The initial hypothesis of this study in child psychology was that an infant could be quite happily separated from its mother (and more importantly, from her breasts) for a short period of time as long as sufficient care, protection, love and alternative foodage were to be made sufficiently available. The purpose of the study was – Read More-
The rugby yesterday was awesome. The Lions were amazing in places, outstanding at times, wonderful in general. Very impressive. Yet not enough. Which is why they lost. Because to compete with the All Blacks you need to be all that, but ALL the time. Any lapse and its punished. As happened yesterday. As I like – Read More-
Here’s something new. An actual quote, as it was spoked, from Jeremy Corbyn, with no embellishment, enhancement, improvement or abuse: (clear throat, ahem): From Hillsborough, to the child sex abuse scandal, to Grenfell Tower – the pattern is consistent: working-class people’s voices are ignored. How is that viewed as anything short of blatant politicising? Of – Read More-
“Last night I dreamt of Manderlay…” Opening words of Daphne Du Maurier’s ‘Rebecca’. Which I know firstly because I’m a totally cultured and literate literary litter-lout who adores true love, romance and the whole chic-lit schtick, and secondly because its Mel’s favourite book/film ever. Otherwise, if I’m honest for once, I wouldn’t have a fucking – Read More-
So there we were, me and Ivani, the gorgeous Brazillian, off to Disneyland. We had fun. And spent the next 3 days together until she went back to Sao Paulo. Leaving me bereft. Again. The last time I’d been ‘bereft, when I left the stewardess on the plane, only lasted a few minutes. Though Ivani – Read More-
Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you. Isn’t that what they say? Well how about ‘even if you’re not paranoid, they’re still gonna fucking get you’. I’m the least paranoid person around. The original ‘things’ll work out just fiiiiiine’. Like Scarlett O’hara with ‘there’s always tomorrow’, I have ultimate faith – Read More-
Sexist stereotypes are pretty much forbidden now. Which is why, like with Eve’s apple in the Garden of Eden, they’re just soooooo good. Do you remember a year or so ago Virgin airlines had an ad on tv and cinema that showed a group of about 6 stewardesses in the newly released uniform, all long-legged, – Read More-