I’ve come up with a totally brilliant idea. I’ll share, but remember where you heard it first!!! No stealing my ‘rights’!! You see the problem with football, other than Chelsea, is that it is a game which naturally flows. It has a consistency and continuity which games like rugby or cricket lack. Ok, it stops – Read More-
They may have overstated things the other day when they said: ‘we’ll be waking your brother up later’. Because ‘later’, when I went in, they said ‘oh no, he needs to be on life support for at least another 4/5 days before we can do that’. Hmmmm. However, they’ve put these on his hands. Presumably – Read More-
There’s an old ‘definition’ of the Yiddish word ‘chutspa’, which broadly means ‘cheek’ or ‘liberty’, but much more so. A man is on trial for murdering both his parents and appeals on the grounds that he’s an orphan. That’s chutspa. And is, in fact, the very same plea that Donald Trump is using in his – Read More-
That is just so bloody typical of Charles. He’s always been jealous of my brother, always trying to outdo him, engage in one-upmanship, steal the limelight. Typical. So when we were kids and out in the car with mum and dad, Rich waved at someone through the window of our Ford Consul. Charles heard about – Read More-
Well we’re still waiting for my brother’s second op, so thought I might as well catch up on the football because… errrr… well, because I wanted to. Even after the ‘travesty of Goodison’, where mighty Spurs failed yet again to score that vital ‘make it safe’ goal against Everton. Leaving it positively unsafe for all – Read More-
My brother’s time-table: 1. Survive the first surgery. And he did. Phew. That was the (first) risky bit. They opened him up, cleaned out all… yeah, cleaned out and then… they left him open!!! It’s what they do. Cover with a bit of cling-film, leave a fucking great chasm open to the world. 2. Do – Read More-
Do you know my bruvva? Always been a problem. Oh no. That’s me. Sorry. Wrong bruvva. He’s never been a problem. Until 2 weeks ago. Then he became ‘a big problem’. He felt ill. Feverish. Bit of a cold. Then, as far as our family’s concerned, ‘the symptom of symptoms!!. The absolute reddest of red – Read More-
One in 9 children has a disability. Holy shit! That was the headline in yesterday’s Times. My heart broke as I was imagining schools overrun with wheelchairs, sports day mixing blade runners with the two-legged minority for the sake of inclusion. Poor little kids painting pretty pictures holding the pens with their toes. It was – Read More-
When the going gets tough, the weaklings start squeaking. Isn’t that the expression? The Americans have a different version, but they would. They’ve always been about tough-talk, John Wayne, lead from the front, stand by your man, I’ll be back, shoot-em-up, the Alamo and all that macho rubbish. But we don’t really, according to everyone – Read More-
So just imagine, for a moment, that you’re an orthodox Jewish person living in a small village in 1872, somewhere in Poland. Somewhere cold. Near the Arctic. Even though Poland is nowhere near the Arctic, it fucking feels like it is for about 8 months of the year. Hence the big, fur hats, long black – Read More-