I’ve always wanted to be that person who says: ‘when you get to my age…’ because I’ve always found that really annoying, stupid and pathetic, all characteristics I strive for in my life. So now I’ve reached sufficient yearage that I could invoke such a phrase in earnest, I can’t do it. Its like admitting – Read More-
We’ve found a new drug. Not, like, for Saturday nights with a line of coke and three shots of Jägermeister, but a medical drug. Oh, one’a’them. Well, not so much ‘found’ it, as slightly ‘re-purposed’ it. Possibly, just adjusted the claims made about it. Its a diabetes drug. And causes weight loss. But now, in – Read More-
I wish to discuss Donald Trump. I hope you haven’t just eaten because I’m fully aware of the effect even thinking about that man can have on a full stomach. Though really, this isn’t about the most vile politician in America, this is more about Americans. And the eternal question: WHY ARE THEY SO UNBELIEVABLY – Read More-
I’ve decided to advance my life skills up to new heights and approach technology as mind-blowingly contemporary as 1996!!! I added face recognition to my phone. Thinking it would make my life easier. So I followed the series of complex instructions (“look at your phone, with your face”) and it gave me a tick. Green – Read More-
We went to Legoland on Thursday. I’ve wanted to go there for ages. Mel too. Even though neither of us is particularly fat, nor have any significant ink-work. Unfortunately it was the day we had the kids so we had to take them with, which was a shame because these places aren’t really for children. – Read More-
I don’t know how successful sales of Barbie have been since they invented them, but I’m guessing BIG. And at some point, a massive decision was made. About Barbie’s feet. The designers and marketing people at Mattel had 85 hours of meetings and decided… that Barbie’s feet should forever and always be at 45 degrees – Read More-
I’m so green these days. I have an electric car, which helps flowers grow and I even have an electric bike. Which must be better than pedalling because if I’m exerting less then I’m breathing out less carbon monoxide than if I was on a push bike and hence I’m melting less of the polar – Read More-
I’m going to see Barbie. Not the doll, the movie. I actually have loads of Barbie dolls, or rather ‘we’ do. Collectively. My daughters’ collection dusted off for Lila and then we ordered online about 75 assorted dresses/shoes/bags/shit from China for £3.95 (p/p included). So we’re stocked. And as such, I feel I have every – Read More-
The shit’s hit the fan at Coutts bank. Which is actually just a few mediocre branches of Nat West specifically used by snobs, snooties, debs, Sloane Rangers, minor aristocrats, major wankers and the tragically aspirational. Because its a 300-year-old ‘private’ bank. Even though its now owned by Nat West who are a bit private but – Read More-
Its all about money. Obscene levels of cash. And all of it, seemingly, going to Kylian Mbappe, the French superstar currently (as at time of writing) playing for Paris St Germain. But he wants to leave and go to Real Madrid. Because Real keep beating PSG in the champions league so the rationale is: move – Read More-