There have been six Premiership matches played this weekend. And from those, 3 of the bottom 5 teams won their matches. Which itself is a bit odd. It’s not for winning games that these clubs get to be in trouble. Bournemouth, also in the bottom 5, drew with Chelsea, who really should be in the – Read More-
Whilst the whole world is talking about Coronavirus some people take action. Like Big Richard at Tai Chi this morning. Affirmative action. He brought a hand sanitiser with him. So as we were throwing each other around, getting in each other’s faces, grunting, panting and grappling, his hands remained… sanitised! The rest of him (and – Read More-
I’m going to Africa. Sub-Saharan. Because it seems to be the only place in the world safe from Coronavirus. I appreciate I might get kidnapped by pirates, slaughtered in a military coup or eaten by a tiger, possibly even a tider if Lila comes with me, and even though there aren’t any in Africa, but – Read More-
OMGeeeeeee!!!!! Book flights now (Coronavirus notwithstanding) and let’s GO! It’s amazing. It’s the most… amazing (did I say that?), incredible, sensational, amazing (?), fantabulously incredulously stupendifying thing EVERRRRRR!!! And it opens in May. We just MUUUUUST go. Cancel plans, tell work, put the breast implants on hold for a month, leave the liposuction for this – Read More-
This is the idea, right? You have two (main, but really, only two) political parties. And they disagree with each other, that’s their job, but agree among themselves. That’s their duty. And only to the degree that their party are acting in the best interests of their constituents. And are morally on message. And aren’t – Read More-
‘Do you fancy going to see the Van Gogh exhibition at the South Bank? We’re free next Sunday afternoon?’ Which loosely translates as: YOU are taking ME to see the Van Gogh next Sunday regardless of whatever match Sky are showing at 4 and there’s no fucking debate!!! I’m an art lover. Ok, I’m quite – Read More-
On your phone, your computer, your ‘devices’ there’s always a facility for ‘sharing’. Like I’m doing with this photo. And that’s a good thing. Sharing photos is good. Sharing food is incitement to riot. Declaration of war. An act of aggression which WILL BE MET WITH FORCE!!!! Everyone knows that ‘sharing plates’ at a restaurant – Read More-
Today is the battle for 4th place in the Premier league. Chelsea currently occupy that space, Spurs, just one point below them, need a win to overtake them. It’s a battle. It’s a war. It’s… its fucking horrible. I hate such games. Whenever spurs ‘just’ need to win/draw/score more than one/concede less than 2/survive for – Read More-
Norovirus is a common affliction. 380,000 cases are found each year. Coincidentally the exact same number as doner kebabs sold each year. That’s a joke actually. I would say ‘in poor taste’, but I love doner kebabs, so I won’t. Novovirus is also known as ‘winter vomiting bug’. One of many classes of Food poisoning. – Read More-
For breakfast, I eat a banana. And an apple. Because my body’s a temple, apparently a fruitarian one, and I don’t want it looking like the Taj Mahal. Yet really, its not about that at all. I eat a banana because its good and, even more oddly in any ‘nutrition conversation’, I like them. And – Read More-