I can’t remember the last time I watched Top Gear. Yet in some ways I consider myself ‘a fan’ of the programme. Contradictory? Possibly, but I don’t care. I’m a fan because when I do catch bits of it I heartily approve. They slag off battery-powered Noddy cars, they crash lorries into school buildings, they – Read More-
I’m a disagreeable, reckless extrovert. And if you agree with that, then you’re not a Londoner. Because we’re ‘disagreeable’, apparently. Therefore you shouldn’t agree. Instead you should jump off a tall building whilst stark naked and singing the National Anthem at the top of your voice. That’s what reckless extroverts should be doing most of – Read More-
The history of England is a long and complex affair. One the details of which I’ve managed to avoid for most of my life. Lists of kings going back 2 thousand years; who needs it? You just kind’a pick it up as you go along. A bit like geography. I learned the cities of our – Read More-
Botox?? Who needs botox? Injecting rat poison into your boat-race always seemed like a fairly stupid thing to do, though when you saw the wrinkle-altering effects on those injected, you then knew it was a fairly stupid thing to do. Their faces stopped working. Smiling like a zombie was never big on my ‘must have’ – Read More-
What a day was yesterday. What a feast. For sporting gluttons like me, it was just a wonderful, almost endless buffet. And I don’t even need to be watching all of it, just knowing its being played is sufficient. Such excitement, the likes of which the sporting world hasn’t really produced since… well, probably since – Read More-
You ask two people where they live, say, at a party. One says: “I live in Penge”, the other: “I’m domiciled in the UK for tax purposes”, could you guess which one is the hedge fund manager? Yes, right once more, all hedge fund managers love Penge. Even though 9 out of 10 couldn’t find – Read More-
We’re suffering an eclipse this morning. Most people enjoy an eclipse, maybe experience an eclipse, even get thrilled by an eclipse. But here, we suffer them. Because its totally fucking cloudy and the eclipse looks… well, just like a grey sky. Never mind, we still have an hour and a half to go before ‘wow-time’, – Read More-
There’s a ‘survey’ thing going round, I’m trying to get a copy, which asks you what you think of certain political statements and opinions. And apparently many of the questions are so subtle that people end up with scores telling them that they’re 60% UKIP when they’d swear they were staunch Labourites, or 72% Green – Read More-
I must admit that I’d never heard of the ‘Exclusive Brethren’ before. They’re a Christian sect who hang out in Plymouth. An offshoot of the original Plymouth Brethren from whom they separated in 1840. Oh, them. ???? They’re a strange bunch, them Brethren. But most sects do seem strange to outsiders, that’s why we call – Read More-
I am boycotting Dolce & Gabbana. As from tomorrow. To be ‘on message’ with all the latest hashtags, I will not be visiting their clothing emporia until this whole Elton-John-gate mess is cleared. up. So today I’m off to Sloane Street to get six new suits, at £9,600 each, a new shirt, £872.48 and some – Read More-