The last bastion of pure maleness has been breached. The last domain in which men ruled, seemingly unopposed, has now fallen beneath the great sword of equality. And I’m not talking about football, the game that has for many years been played by gels as well as boys, but football commentary and punditry. Gary Linneker World. And he’s a MAN.

The Oxford English Dictionary defines a football pundit thus:

A GEEZER (note, not a woman, girl, bird, tart or nuffink remotely female or feminine), a geezer wot talks abart football within a very set specific set of rules. He must speak in stupid, repetitive cliché wherever possible. He must say ‘ya know’ once every 9 words or may lose his licence to pundify. And if he doesn’t state the phrase ‘at da end’a’da day’ once every turn then Golgotha will fall. He must at all times talk in improper English, never complete his sentences and is forbidden from pronouncing the ‘H’ at the beginning of any word. Glottal stops are optional. Ridiculous jargon is mandatory and the mixing up of adjectives and adverbs is good…ly, and more betterer.

Which is why Alan Shearer is the perfect pundit. Lovely fella but someone who obviously left school long before the grammar class started, to practice headers. Which further influenced his word flow as the inevitable concussions took their toll.

Then one day, along came a blond. Gaby Yorath/Logan. The first name that of her father, one of a group of infamous Leeds thugs from their heyday in the early 70s. The latter name that of her husband, former captain of Scotland’s international rugby team. And although it was only Scotland…

Sorry. Yeah, Gaby. Not quite as pretty as Gary Linneker but she was no mere eye candy as she became the virtual Ms Linneker and presented all the sports shows he didn’t. But she was educated, almost posh, pronounced all the letters that other ‘sports personalities’ didn’t know existed.

And so to this world cup, in which there are lady footballers commentating (some even in possession of law degrees), and ladies introducing the shows. Not just to comment on the handbags carried by the WAGS but actually talking about football. In a new way. With feelings and emotions… ok, maybe not, but its different, its intelligent and quite honestly its refreshing. I’ve heard every phrase that Jermaine Jenas knows, repeated a million times.

So there’s outrage. Obviously. But its a good thing. A great thing. It speaks of the game moving away from its dinosaur past into the bright and more equal future. I just wish they’d show a bit more cleavage, is all.

Happy Sunday

A xxxx