There’s a ‘survey’ thing going round, I’m trying to get a copy, which asks you what you think of certain political statements and opinions. And apparently many of the questions are so subtle that people end up with scores telling them that they’re 60% UKIP when they’d swear they were staunch Labourites, or 72% Green when they’re crusty old Tories.

The questions are not the normal:

“Do you hate poor people and wish they’d go and live elsewhere?” (70% Conservative; 30% UKIP).

“Should all foreigners and non-white people be deported tomorrow?” (60% UKIP, 40% BNP).

“Are tax avoiders criminals, even if they’re the leaders of supposedly left-wing political parties?” (50% Labour, 50% clueless, 50% Maths Deficient Party).

“Shouldn’t we be trying to recycle car exhaust as edible seaweed?” (90% Green, 10% Looney).

“Do you think the Health Service would be more efficient if hospital waiting lists were organised according to skin colour?” (85% Nazi, 15% Scottish Nationalists).

No they’re more subtle and the results apparently surprising. Except its not that much of a surprise as all it really shows is just how similar, how ‘grey’, how much wishy-washy middle-ground the political parties all now spout.

It also shows my own personal problem with political affiliation, which is that I only like about 10% of what any party says. There is never a ‘whole package’ of views, stances and propositions that I adhere to so totally that I reach a ‘that’s for me!’ moment. Never. Instead I get degrees of hatred. Levels of contempt. And end up voting for the ones who offend me least. Or, on many occasions, not voting at all.

So yesterday we had ‘the budget’. Where our esteemed chancellor shuffled the nation’s funds to try and offer sweeteners for everyone so they’ll vote for the government. Well, you can’t vote for all of it because its a coalition.

For the ‘wealthy’, he increased levels before higher rate tax is paid. Great. Higher rate tax payers (ie, whilst not necessarily ‘rich’, not poor either) will be £80 a year better off!!!! Get on the list for a new Ferrari now.

For the lowest paid, the tax threshold is raised so they’ll be £900 better off, which is significant and good.

For the boozers, beer has been reduced by 1p a pint. Wow. They now have to drink 100 pints a night so they can tell their wives they saved a pound. What a waste of the paper its written on. 1p. I didn’t even realise that 1p was still currency.

So I think I’m going to vote for Lionel Messi. On last night’s performance alone, when he didn’t even score, he just showed, again and again, how impossibly brilliant he is. How fantastic to watch. How electric and mesmerising football can be. The best ever? I think he has a case.

I certainly won’t be voting for Manchester City.

Happy Thursday

Axxxx