It’s life, Jim. Yet an alien, bizarre, obscure kind of half-life in which ‘lunch’ becomes the main feature of the week, followed closely (ok, and dinner) by ‘the allotted exercise period’. The police have new powers in which ‘being somewhere’ is now possibly a crime, depending on the mood of the particular officer in question. And whilst people have been banging on for weeks about infringements on our liberty, I’ve been reminding everyone that ITS A FUCKING VIRUS, POTENTIALLY A KILLING ONE, DON’T BE A NOB!!!! But the changes are coming fast and furious as the plague escalates. And so laws can’t actually be passed quickly enough. Therefore the government make suggestions, albeit very strongly worded ones, and leave it to the police to interpret and implement them ‘as they see fit’. Ergo; we are living in a police state.

Yet even more importantly, there’s no football. Leading to the most interesting question (other than ‘WHERE ARE MY FUCKING CORONAVIRUS TEST KITS????’) of all, which is how the immense and massively extensive gravy-train that is ‘football’ going to cope and/or survive being hacked off, quite literally, right at its wallet.

People are cancelling their Sky sports packages, with Sky worried that they won’t put them back on afterwards. Assuming there is an ‘afterwards’ (that’s gloomy). So they won’t be paying the clubs for tv rights. And the clubs have immense wage bills. Truly immense. So Daniel Levy, the most financially conscious and careful of all Premier chair-people, has stated that as all the 550 non-playing staff at Spurs are ‘on furlough’ and thus will receive only 80% of their salaries, what do you do about the players?

An office worker there may get 35k a year. But for now that reduces to 28k. Whereas virtually all players get in excess of 60k a WEEK. So how bad for the people who basically keep the club running, if the players don’t take a cut that they can afford to the point of barely noticing, to keep them in line with those who will now struggle with rent or mortgages or car payments?

They reckon that the current situation may now create a massive reassessment of all the (stupid, ridiculous, outrageous) money in football and cause a total restructuring. Which will be one great thing to emerge from the current shit-storm.

Lila is 3 today. She is an April no-one’s fool. And every one of those 1000-odd days has been a thing of wonder. Not that I’m in any way obsessed or obsessive. It’s just what it is. Happy birthday to my favourite granddaughter on any world.

A xxxx