Advance warning; the following may contain words that might offend some people. Tossers, granted, but sensitive tossers nonetheless. A minority, like all others, we have to fucking respect.

Because I want to talk about C******. The football club, that is, rather than the people who go there. They get less **s. Because this week a virtual epidemic is spreading through the Chelsea faithful (an ‘f’-word we can use). These are the symptoms: following really abusive behaviour at a football match, their faces become increasingly blurry and indistinct and then all their spoken words contain *******. The health workers are perplexed, the medics bemused, but its nasty and its certainly spreading. Which is not such a problem if this seemingly nasty condition is confined to Stamford Bridge, where, quite frankly, the return of the Plague might be seen as a blessing, but its now gone all the way to Budapest as well.

On Sunday, as their beloved team were actually beating the previously unbeatable Manchester City, England striker Raheem Sterling walked towards the stands to retrieve the ball. And was greeted, by some Chelsea fans, with a torrent of vile, evil abuse. And that was where the ***s came in. Raheem heard the fan call him ‘a black c***!’ The fan in question (yes, we know who he is, we know who they all are because we have them on tv and we know who sits in those seats) has said that he atcherley said: ‘you Manc c***!’ Oh, that’s fine then.

It’s not what was said. It’s not about whether it was racist or not. It’s about the level of almost violent hatred with which these words were spoken. No amount of asterisks can sanitise the video of those four scumbags. No amount of blurring can hide the incredible level of aggression in their body language as they spoke. Or rather, screamed, red-faced and blood-vessels a’bursting with the sheer force of their vileness.

Then, on Thursday night, in an unrelated incident… other than the involvement of Chelsea fans, but that might just be a coincidence, a group of football fans in Hungary were singing anti-Semitic songs. But this is the really odd bit. The songs were aimed at Spurs fans, as are most anti-Semitic songs in football. And Spurs weren’t playing. So probably none of their fans were there. Nor, it can be presumed, were many bothering to watch Chelsea on tv. Not on a ‘Thursday night’, surely, who watches that?

Nothing will happen about the racism incident against Sterling. The Premier League don’t give a shit about anything other than putting more games on tv to get more money. But UEFA, toothless as they are about most things, are shit hot on racism. And thus may make Chelsea play in empty stadia.

My main worry would then be; where are all those evil, vile, hate-filled, non-racist, anti-Manc bottom-feeders on the nights when at least they’re normally off the streets dispensing hatred at Chelsea? Where will they go? They’re still evil, still violent, still horrible beyond horrible, they might end up round here!!!

As even David Baddeil should now realise, the ‘problem’ with Chelsea is not down to ‘the Yids’, the name, the songs, the team, nor down to Raheem Sterling or Budapest. The problem is Chelsea fans.

Happy Saturday

A xxxx