There’s only one class of people we should all aspire to. Those right at the top of the status tree. Who are so important, so exalted, revered and, yes, so HOLY, that appointments to see them are more difficult to arrange than those with your doctor. Or lawyer, plumber, dentist or even MP. It’s easier – Read More-
Years ago, on a creative writing course, I wrote a story about how we’re becoming so stuck in the cyber world that eventually we’ll ‘evolve’ into some kind of hybrid, linked permanently to a computer by some kind of horrible, organic USB… thing from our belly-buttons. That was prophetic as it was about 25 years – Read More-
Do you watch the film or read the book? Rebecca. To Kill a Mockingbird. The Godfather. Rosemary’s Baby. Anything by Stephen King (except ‘Shawshank’ which no-one realises he wrote). What’s better? The book or the film? Well why not be greedy and do both? You read a book (they always precede; any books that come – Read More-
My Dear Chancellor of the Exchequer, I’d just like to take this opportunity to thank you so much for finally understanding the needs of the country so perfectly. As I see it, there are three groups of people in this fine and verdant land: Those, like me, signed off sick for the last 22 years – Read More-
My mate the Hindu once said to me about his brother-in-law, a Seikh; “lovely people, the Seikhs, very war-like”. And yet here we are today with Britain’s Seikhs trying to claim that Islam was spread ‘by the sword’. Trying, because saying such a sentence would now be classed as ‘Islamaphobic’, should the definition of that – Read More-
The heading of today’s little piece is a play on words. Not a very good one. Best I could come up with at short notice. I needed something which implied ‘Lammy’ and ‘ated’. Cos we all ‘ate David Lammy. I mentioned him yesterday for, essentially, being a fuckwit, but quite frankly, having reviewed the situation – Read More-
This is a week of excitement. In relative terms. Because this week sees the first round of voting to decide who will be the next leader of the Conservative Party! And life doesn’t get more exciting than that. The battle to become the leader of the smallest minority opposition party since 1732. Yet it’s important. – Read More-
Oh my god, it’s the best news ever!!! Well, unfortunately Kier Starmer is still the PM, Russians are still in Ukraine, Israeli hostages are being found dead, I’m still in danger of freezing in the winter without my heating allowance, but there’s a rumour that… Harry is coming home!!! Like, the Prince? Red headed dude? – Read More-
I know that governments have a serious job to do. They have to ‘say it like it is’, except when scandal, sleaze, parties or horrrendoulsy poor landlords are concerned, I get that. But is all fucking doom and gloom from our new lot. Led by Misery-in-chief, Dreary Kiery, we were never going to get the – Read More-
Ok, I’d never heard of ‘Telegram’, the media ‘thing’, until last week when Pavel Durov, the owner, was arrested in France. For ‘being in possession of a communication medium which bad people use’. Ya don’t mess with Macron. He might look like a scrawny little mummy’s boy scrap of arrogance and typically French stroppiness, but – Read More-