I must admit to not having watched any of the Australian Open tennis tournament. I should have. I love tennis. I play tennis. I watch every second of Wimbledon I can find. But the Aussie… and the French… New York… nyeh, not so keen. They’re every bit as Grand Slammy as Wimbledon but just not green enough for my tastes as a spectator. Even though I never actually play on grass myself. Preferring other drugs. More medical ones. Though the incentive to watch the Aussie this year was great because Djokovic was sent home, rather spectacularly and famously and as I can’t stand him, that should have made me watch. But didn’t.

Maybe having the big matches on at breakfast time over here was the issue, I don’t know. So I missed the women’s final today. Won by… An Aussie!!!! For the first time since Evonne Goolagong in 1977. So well done to Ash Barty. Even if she looks a bit like the simpleton brother in the Paul Hogan show. I won’t hold that against her. Takes a lot to win a Grand Slam and she was worthy.

The men’s final is tomorrow morning/evening, depending on where you’re watching it and I’m hoping Rafa Nadal wins it. Because he’s lovely. He’s nice. He’s Spanish. And he’ll beat the horrible Djokovic to a 21st Grand Slam win. Though Novak will in fact hold a different record. For the chestiest, stupidest, unvaccinated-est fraudster in tennis. Possibly ever.

His ‘proof of entry’ originally submitted, for an unvaccinated Serbian dickhead, was in the form of two forms. One showing he actually had covid and was testing positive, and another to show he was over it and testing negative. Thus establishing he has antibodies but no longer ‘active’. Yet there’s a little problem. The forms, generated by Serbian computers, show that the ‘negative’, second test has a much higher serial number than the first one, which was generated two weeks before. Which is strange. As computers are nothing if not logical. And, as journalists discovered, is almost impossible. Unless…

Surely the Serbian Conspiracy of 2021/22 couldn’t be such that the nation were behind Novak’s pathetic attempts to dupe the Australian immigration system? By apparently ‘back-dating’ the first test so that his ‘infection’ was in the required time period? Would an entire nation lie?!?!?!? Apparently they would would. And did.

Come on Rafa

A xxxx