Now if Matt Hancock and Gina Coladangelo had been clever, like Mel and me in this picture, there’d be no story. No sacking. No aggro. No bother at all. Sensible, that’s us. And Covid safe.

Ok there’s the whole moral issue about two families being destroyed, about chronic self-indulgence and lust over decency and a few other trivial concepts which don’t seem to worry anybody outside the Daily Mail, but the resignation was about breach of (stupid, pretty ineffective, possibly meaningless) covid measures which HE put in place for the rest of us.

Now its all about ‘Boris should have sacked him on Friday’. Rather than waiting for him to fall on his sword on Saturday. The whole message from the inept and useless opposition party has become about ‘Boris lacking the spine, the balls, the backbone… lungs, teeth, hair, elbows and most other anatomical parts, to sack him!’

I don’t even like Boris but this is an argument not worth having. Unlike the one about Gina’s initial appointment but ‘we’ are still looking into that. Her Majesty’s Opposition really needs to up its game.

I’ve worked out why the Cotswolds are so beautifully, gloriously, spectacularly, verdantly, green. Rain. Then more rain. Then loads more rain. Then 10 minutes of sunshine, then let the heavens open once more.

It wasn’t actually too bad today, the overnight rain had stopped by breakfast. Not that I gave a shit at that time, because hotel breakfasts are magical things and I don’t care about the weather whilst indulging. And indulge I do.

So we went for a country walk. Got a map from the hotel, checked the parameters of Google maps (as if) and out we went. Like the true townies we are, into the countryside where Oxfordshire meets Gloucestershire. I wore shorts and hiking boots. Because mud was predicted. And even before we got catastrophically lost, as we always do, we got catastrophically wet. The water being borne by the long grass and… catastrophic levels of stinging nettles. And we’re in shorts. Hmmm…

We circled several fields several times, looking for a landmark which wasn’t a tree or shrub. And… we were lost. But found our way back. Eventually. Wetly.

And now we’re home. To the paved streets and solid pavements and bloody sunshine!! in London. Safe. I’m done with green.

Happy Monday

A xxxx