Israel is a confusing and unpredictable place. That’s why its in the middle east. Because it spans the civility and politeness of Europe (errrr… Bosnia, Catalonia, Spanish Civil War, The War to end all Wars, and the one that followed it…), yeah, civilised. And the far east, those savage orientals who murder with swords, eat funny things and make copy Gucci handbags. Thus the middle east. In the middle of… pretty much the sublime and the ridiculous, but I’m not saying which is which. And the middle east is a big place. Massive. 47,346.9 cubic hecti-acres of bigness. (Don’t quote me on that one, but really don’t). And in all that vastness, there is but a weeny little stip of land, between the Mediterranean on its west coast and the RedSea on its southern easterly coast. And that teeny bit of land peopled by the most peaceful, bookish and yet persecuted people on the planet, has always (well, since 1948, when it became ‘official’)`been a bit of a problem. An enfant terrible in the vast masses of the combined Arab Nations.

And yet the food is so fabulous. That in itself should be a cause for love, for inclusion, to some form of acceptance. Israel is pretty much summed up, you could say, by Yotam Otalenghi. He’s a chef, a brilliant chef. A brilliant Israeli chef who is gay. And whose partner is a Palestinian. But this is all fine here, and even in Britain where he’s actually much bigger than he is here. Yet anywhere else in that vast expanse of ‘the middle east’, Otalenghi wouldn’t even be allowed in, because they don’t allow Israelis into almost all the Arab nations. And if they did let him in, it would only be to execute him for his homosexuality. Yet here its cool. All is well. Because the bit they never tell you on the news, in between the ‘apartheid’ bollocks and the ‘nazi’ accusations of total fucking ignorance, is that in Israel Jews and Arabs coexist everywhere in happy, harmonious equality. Burkinis are not banned in Israel. They’re just part of the scenery on every beach. Arabs live here, work here, vote here, join the army here, play in the national football team.

But they rarely mention that. They prefer to focus on Gaza. In which there are thousands of Palestinians who used to work in Israel, who still go to hospitals in Israel, but who can’t now ‘cross the wall’. Because unfortunately, their little land-strip is ruled by an organisation who have in its charter ‘the destruction of Israel and the death to all its Jews’. And these are not mere words for Hamas. These words incite action. Hamas are just ISIS spelt differently. Same ideals, same ideology, same methods. So in response to the years of bombing and suicide attacks and shootings and stabbings of Israeli citizens (not soldiers, just civilians), in response to that they built a wall. And the attacks dropped by over 90%. And its cruel and its tragic and its an awful thing to do to the large proportion of Gazans who are truly innocent. But if we, in London, or Manchester, or Brussels, or Paris, could build a wall that would ensure our citizens safety from terrorist attacks with such effect, would we not do it?

And you have to wonder why otherwise all the arabs would choose to stay in Israel. When most are Jordanians, Lebanese, Syrians, Egyptians and north Africans. The answer to which is that here they live in a free and liberal democracy. The only one in the entire ‘middle east’. Where their children are educated at state expense, where the hospitals, some of the finest in the world, will treat them on their Nationalised Health system and where they can live in peace, pray to whoever they wish, integrate as much as they want to. And eat some really amazing food.

Sorry to rant after such a long pause, but every time I come here I get such a fantastically strong positive vibe that I re-wind every relevant news report for the last 6 months and think, once again: why would people spout such crap so consistently about such an amazing place that they’ve obviously never visited.

Now I’m going to the beach and I’m going to eat lots of things.

Happy Tuesday

A xxxx