So we’re no longer going to treat ‘foreigners’ under the NHS. Bloody good job. Let ’em rot where they fall. Then go through their pockets and see if there’s anything worth nicking, take their boots and let the ‘bring out yer dead’ geezer pick ’em up with his wheelbarrow in the morning. Now that’s what I call progress towards putting NHS money back where it belongs; into the well-being of good, honest, Ingish people wot pays for it in the first place.

What about the Scots and the Welsh? Should we treat them, or are they ‘foreign’ too? Especially if the inevitable happens and Scotland takes itself out of the Union (Jack; leaving a big hole where the blue bit used to live).

People’s dying words will be: “do… you… … take… Amer… ican… Expr… …”

Ah but its a noble plan by Jeremy Hunt, the Health Minister. And it has mass appeal, unlike most of what the government does at the moment. This brings out the very heart of the ‘why should we pay for those ‘orrible bastards wot don’t belong ‘ere’ matter. But its all down to the implementation, to the point of entry, to the responsibility for the decisions.

A sick Nigerian turns up at Casualty. Is it the nurse’s job, or the doctor’s for that matter, to do a credit check? To check for documentation? Swipe a card? In a nation where carrying Id is not a requirement. Do we know that this Nigerian isn’t British? Works here? Pays his NI. Some do. Ok, not many, most of the ones who contact me are only interested in swindling their government out of someone else’s money. So if the guy is unconscious, who takes the responsibility for declaring whether he/she should be treated? A big responsibility. Hypocratic Oath time.

And the point of initial contact is the only place to ascertain this. Sending a bill afterwards is just pissing in the wind. So therefore do hospitals now need to employ ‘account managers’ or ‘payment bastards’, who sit there 24 hours each day vetting the sick for their eligibility for free treatment? In which case, either you’d need loads or you’re gonna have big queues. Very big queues.

Therefore what is the cost of these additional people? And the cost of chasing payments?

Because much as I disagree totally with ‘NHS tourism’ and freeloading foreign people in general… in fact with most foreign people in general, if the cost of implementing the system is more than the 50 mil a year they stand to save, then WHAT IS THE SODDING POINT?

And whilst we’re there; what about the kind of ‘reverse health tourism’? When people go to Turkey because breast enlargements are only 50 quid each there (that’s 100 quid a pair, or sometimes, buy one get one free). But the silicon bursts, the scars inflame, infection sets in and they end up getting new breasts, paid for by me, on the NHS at six times the initial cost that having it done properly in the first place would have cost?

The NHS is such a mess. And getting messier.

Happy Saturday. Unless your an ill Indian.

A xxxx