It’s over. All the Brexit bollocks has finally reached an end, a conclusion, the pound’s recovered (a bit), the future looks rosy and everything is good again in the Kingdom.

We have a deal!

Ok, we have the basis of the fundamentals of the possibility of a mere chance of a deal, but even that is way more than we’ve had before. Enough to raise Stirling a lofty 2% against the dollar. But the numbers are insignificant; its the direction of travel that’s critical. The pound moved UPWARDS. Holy shit.

Now ALL we have to do is finalise the details, all of them, get them accepted by Brussels (how hard can that be?) and then seek parliamentary approval (how hard can THAT be???) next Saturday and we’re home and dry.

NEXT SATURDAY!!!!!

Yeah, how long does it take, FFS? Week is ample. Boris may take this weekend off to sunbathe in Texas with Jennifer Arcuri as part of an ongoing mission to promote tech start-ups with no strings attached or abuse of position, squandering of public funds or sleazy sex involved. Then he can start refreshed on Tuesday. Loads’a time.

And here’s the thing. Remainers, among who I used to count myself until they started acting a bit free with the project fearisms and the hyperbole and the doomsday scenarios, they use terms like ‘off the edge of a cliff’ and ‘catastrophic’ and painting all the doom and gloom. So although I still don’t want to leave, I’ve reached the point of ANYTHING BUT MORE OF THIS SHIT in my life. Somewhat reassured by Boris and the Brexit brigade constantly telling us that even with no deal, all will be fine. No really. Fine. No worries.

And then up pipe Nissan. The car company. Who aren’t remainers or Brexiteers, though you’d kind’a think they’re more the former than the latter because they built a massive, fuck-off factory in Sunderland decades ago just so they could export easily to Europe. Which they do with 70% of the cars made there. Where 6,000 good, honest (as honest as anyone from the north-east) workers earn their crusts. And Nissan said that if we ‘crash out’ without a deal, they will PROBABLY (elevated from ‘possibly’) have to close the plant.

And that struck a chord with me. This wasn’t Dominic Grieve getting distraught, it wasn’t Gina Miller doing her bit for democracy and the Queen, wasn’t overly reactionary posturing from any of the countless remain morons. This was a Japanese company which employs thousands of our people telling it like it is. And that says way more than a hundred speeches in Parliament. Because its not mere speculation, baseless hypothesising, wishful thinking or scare mongering. It’s reality.

Too wet for tennis, there’s no fucking football, the rugby’s been cancelled, I might as well join Extinction Rebellion for the day and superglue myself to Nelson’s Column with everyone else. Or go for brunch with Lila and Joey…

Happy Saturday

A xxxx