Paul Walker, star of the Fast and the Furious franchise of movies, died yesterday. In a car crash. A very fast car crash. A Porsche. Being driven (not by Paul; he was the passenger) in a very fast and furious manner. As the police said, in that non-committal, policey way they have, ‘speed was involved’. Quel surprise.

And what a tragedy. Not necessarily for the world of good movies, but for his family and that of the driver.

I loved the original movie. I always love original movies, then get bored really quickly once the 4th one comes out to accompany the latest version of the eponymous video game and back up the 2nd tv spinoff series.

The original movie starred Paul with Vin Diesel. All shaven head and smoulering stares. Beauty and the Beast. Paul smiled, Vin grimaced and flexed his muscles threateningly.

If I’m honest I only loved the film because it featured a Dodge Charger with a 1000 horse power engine and a supercharger so big that the car couldn’t drive under low bridges. And it roared. Seriously, loudly, throatily, wickedly did it roar. And I love that roar. That’s why G-d invented V8 engines, so they could roar. And burble.

Someone who loves drag racers and street cars must have found that car and built a film around it. I would have if I was in the movie biz and found a car like that. But you need some people. Otherwise its not really a movie, just a car. Ok, we’ll have a dangerous bald one with muslces, taking the ‘muscle car’ theme to a living metaphor, and we need a pretty one. Ok, let’s use Paul Walker, he’s pretty. Get a whole bunch of other cars, slicker, Japanese shit, all high tuning and computerised turbo chargers, and a few women. Gorgeous women. You gotta have women with cars, they go together like… like… well, like women and cars. Take off as many of their clothes that still allow a PG rating and make a 2 hour car chase.

Rinse and repeat.

Other films have starred cars.

Bullitt, with Steve McQueen driving a fantastic Mustang; Vanishing Point, starring an amazing Dodge Challenger and a few actors (very few in fact), even such total shit as Starsky and Hutch, the dire Dukes of Hazzard. All about American Muscle. Proper cars. That pollute the atmosphere, deplete the ozone layer, chew up natural resources and are pretty much anti-social in every way. Which is why I love them.
That and the noise. The roar.

Rip up the tarmac.

Or, for Paul Walker, R.I.P. the tarmac.

Happy Monday

A xxxx