One week. Six more days. Ok, almost 1 week. And then we’ll know EVERYTHING. The fighting will be over, the battles ended, the… the other things… done!

We’ll know who is to be our next Prime Minister. And with what kind of majority. We’ll know whether Brexit will ‘get done’ (a phrase which has become so hateful I’d like to have it tattooed on Jeremy Corbyn’s arse). And we’ll know whether Arsenal will be relegated this season. Even though they’re only one point behind us and we’re still ‘going for 4th place’. But that’s not the point (sic). The point is that they are currently awful and haven’t won in their last 9 games. Their most barren spell for the last 40 years. Freddie Ljungberg has failed to produce the ‘Solskjaer effect’ and the team have actually become worse under his ‘guidance’.

But we mustn’t let this detract us from the election. Even though its much more fun and delightful. That would make me guilty of schadenfreude and nastiness and not being a nice person. Hmmm…

Yesterday the Brexit party defected. Nigel Farage’s latest attempt to introduce the ultimate ‘1-trick pony’ into the political world backfired as four of its MEPs told voters to back Boris. Presumably to ‘get Brexit done’. Possibly because they no longer see any virtue in being associated with the vanity project of a mouthy, right wing narcissist, and possibly because they were all conservatives to begin with and only joined Nige because we weren’t Brexiting quickly enough to suit their own small islander mentality and racist predispositions. One of them is Jacob Rees-Mogg’s sister and another was a former speech-writer for the Conservatives. Traitors!!!

Yet this has become the most angry and personal election campaign I can remember. Nasty. Aggressive. Parties and personalities who genuinely hate each other. Rather than gentlemen united by their common love of the country yet divided by their ideals of how it should function. Never mind Andrew Neill with whom Boris will not debate, I wouldn’t talk to the fat Scottish fucker either. Horrible, arrogant man. I think Boris and Jezza should just get in the ring, take off the gloves, pick up a baseball bat each and slug it out. And if Corbyn should win, shoot him.

Yes, six days (of AG-O-NEEEEE) left and then all will be revealed.

Happy Friday

A xxxx