We love a grave. Can’t get enough. So in our spare time Mel & I go and visit the dead. Nothing morbid, nothing bizarre, perverse or even more than a touch ‘strange’ but we love a good cemetery. We eventually did Highgate, possibly the world’s most famous burial ground, we’ve done Recoletta in Buenos Aries, possibly the world’s most visited burial ground, and we’ve walked round churchyards in dozens of little British towns and villages and in most countries we visit. Because they’re just so interesting. They are little stories, hundreds of them, all in lines. Obviously the best ones are the stories so old that they can’t even be read after 200 years of weather, elements and ghosts. (If you want to be noticed or remembered, only use granite. Nothing else lasts. You’ll thank me for that tip 200 years after you die).

Yesterday it was Abney Park, just along the road in Stoke Newington, a stone’s throw from that other famous burial ground, The Emirates. And Abney Park is just that; a park. But filled with graves. 200,000 of them, apparently but I chose not to actually check. And it is a gorgeous place and incredibly ramshackle and dilapidated. The graves are so close to each other that the dead of Stoke Newington were never lonely. Rows upon rows of headstones, touching each other and with more rows behind. Some obviously are more grand (fucking capitalist fat-cats) and all tell a tale.

And thus I missed all of the Manchester City annihilation of Huddersfield but did manage to catch the end of Brighton’s annihilation of Manchester United.

Jose Morinho last week said of his local rivals that ‘they can buy top players but they can’t buy class’. In which case, I’d definitely go for the top player option, Jose, cos then you might win a fucking game. ‘Class’ is just some mere abstract concept relating to the judgment of others and way beyond his intellectual remit. And how coincidental that after reading that their esteemed manager is really unhappy with United’s inability to land his desired signings in the transfer window (current players read: YOU AIN’T GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME OR THIS TEAM) the United team put on a really lacklustre performance showing terrible attitude.

Jose is always and only about Jose. When they win its HIM. When they lose its everyone else; ref, owners, players, tea-ladies, anyone. And that’s ‘class’???

Happy alive Monday

A xxxx