So my head’s been itchy and scaly for decades. The twin looked at it to examine. Though it looked like a monkey looking for tasty nits as she parted my hair, she is a doctor, so she’s allowed to eat anything she finds on my scalp. But what she found was that it was ‘Seborrheic’. Holy shiiiiittttt! And suggested that I use coal tar shampoo. I mean, is that even legal in the globally-warming world??? Fucking coal!!! The devil’s substance? Anyway, I’m using it. And what happens is, you apply the shampoo, get a lovely lather, and then smell like a racing car. With a fuel leak. Its so strong and pungent that my eyes water. Though, obviously, that gets mixed up with the shower so its not a big deal. And then I emerge from the shower, but unlike the usual redolence of peaches, coconut, vanilla, cocoa-butter or chilli & garlic (I have some strange beauty products), I stink like the ESSO at Henleys Corner. But what happens if I was meeting Greta Thunberg? Can you imagine????

My education continues, hopefully forever. I finished Dave Grohl’s book, which is sweet. Lovely guy but by the end, all that amazingly gushing exuberance and humility actually starts to very very slightly grate a little. I still love him, but he’s away better drummer than writer.

So I found a new, BBC 4 music series called ‘discover’. Just half hour each. Potted histories, narrated by the same bunch of ‘talking heads’ as always narrate such things. Did Elvis Costello, Mamas and the Pappas, Crosby Stills Nash (and Young), (because Neil Young was always ‘in and out’ due to possibly being the most argumentative Canadian ever to sing Southern Man), and there’s loads more. And the BBC planned them, as I requested, to be ‘precisely the length of Mel’s bath-time’, which they are. And I managed to download a much longer documentary about John Belushi too. Because he was the best ever. Best ever drug taker, comedian, lunatic and wild man.

Education can be quite a time consuming exercise. But it does distract from the football, which is a waste of everybody’s time.

Happy Monday

A xxxx