I’m just reading a great book by Ben Elton. Safe to say, all his books are great. So far. This one’s about time travel.

“Oh, not tiiiiiiiime tttttttravel; boooooooringgggg. Don’t say; its all about going back to 1963 and becoming your own grandfather, or the other ‘time para-fuckin’-dox’ where you bang your head in 1357 and immediately disappear because the person who stopped to help you out missed his one opportunity to bump into his otherwise-would’a’been wife at the armour-repairers sorting out her dad’s breast-plate, and thus they never had their one and only child, who would have eventually become the head-banger’s great, great, great… you get the picture”.

But its none of that. I’ll spare the mechanics but they’re original. So a guy goes back to just before the first world war, to stop it happening, hopefully to make a happier Europe for the entire future of Europe. Good luck with that.

And you can’t help but think; what if you went back to… pre-revolutionary Russia, or pre-war Germany, or Cuba for the Bay of Pigs, Tottenham in 1961? Or how about you went back to a football match in about 1975? When it was baaaaad. When rival fans would arrange mass fucking riots between themselves, fuelled only by Carling Extra Strong Lager and all the Stanley knives you could eat. When one minute you’d be standing (yes, we stood standing in them dark days) there admiring a wonderful goal by Martin Chivers, (yes, we scored goals in them dark days) the next you’d find 75 West Ham fans in yer face because they’d run across the pitch and dived into the Park Lane end for some ‘aggro’.

And on the way home groups of horrible, loud, drunk thugs would terrorise people. All people. Any people. But especially people who might be ‘different’. They’d be an instant target. Black people. Indian people. Eskimos with their huskies. Lotta them round Tottenham in 1975. And these vile specimens would insult, abuse, push, cajole and be openly racist and scummy. And very scary.

In fact, if you did manage to time-warp back to such a time, it would look pretty much like Tuesday night on the Paris Metro when a group of Chelsea dirt threw a black man off a tube train, twice, insulted him, racially abused him and any others just going about their business, threatened stabbings, and generally acted in a way that can only be described as ‘the way Chelsea fans have always acted and probably always will’.

Its all very good and well sticking a couple of ‘kick it out!!!!’ anti-racism posters up at Stamford Bridge; its also rather ironic that half of Chelsea’s ‘superstars’ are black and that the team is owned by a Jew. But its all window-dressing if you can’t change the attitudes of the horrible rabble who go there.

Lobotomise all Chelsea fans TODAY!!! Its the only way.

Happy Thursday

A xxxx