Let me tell you about my holiday. All holidays really, because their main job is to take you away from the norm. And keep you sufficiently away from it that you enter a wonderful, stress-free unreality-land where your main concerns are an even suntan and what you’re going to eat next. And drink while you’re going there to eat it. I’ve even managed to avoid the News. I have no idea how much more shit has happened in Afghanistan since I left home last weekend. Have the Americans gone back? Have the Taliban become nice? Changed their tack? Become gay-inclusive? Woman friendly? Or at very least come to realise that ‘equality’ doesn’t mean raping men AND women. I have no idea. The news is something I obsess about at home. But deprived of my morning Times (online counts for NOTHING) and BBC news at 10 (world service is shit), I remain in a glorious news-free zone. Have our taxes risen, as messages keep telling me? Should I just stay here as a tax exile?

One bit of news I managed to glean, mainly because it can’t upset my sense of wellbeing, like the cricket did, was learning of lovely Emma Raducanu and her amazing exploits in the US Open. She’s 18, into the semi-finals and thus already half a million quid richer than when she left home three weeks ago. And she’s almost unplayably brilliant. She is now the British women’s number 1!!!! Which I realise is like being the best skier in Soweto, the most successful stud of all INCELs or the least credible of all Greek gods. But sometimes being a bright light in a dull pond, you can really, really REALLY shine, even in a bigger pond. And smile all the way through.

And I’m yet to get to grip with ordering food here. We go to a taverna, sometimes a meat one, sometimes fish and the same thing happens. I order something, Mel orders something, we order a salad and some chips to share. Yet what arrives is food sufficient for an entire wedding party. (I’d love to see what they serve at weddings here: holy shit!). But that’s not all. It is customary to give you lots of free things. In case you’re still hungry after eating enough for 10. So they bring you amazing starters, just a tray-load, ‘help yourself, whatever you want’. Then fruit comes afterwards. Lots of fruit. And a little sorbet, go on, just a waffer-thin one…

These are not expensive restaurants. The food is fantastic but cheaper than a take-away in London. Including the wine, beer or whatever.

Come to Greece. And fucking EATTTTTT!!!!!!

Very happy and quite full Thursday

A xxxx