So there’s 2 guys ‘avin’ a chat darn the pub, right?

An’ Iain says: “‘ere, Malky, youse never gonna guess whooo they just signed to play on the wing. Only a faaaarrrrkin’ Chinky!”

“Naaahhhhh!!!” says Malky, “yer ‘avin a laaarf, ain’t’cha??? A frikkin Chinky? Ya know why, cos ‘is agent is a fat jewboy and once they sniff money… or food…”

This is the gist of what occurred in what passes for communication, between Malky Mackay and Iain Moody, when both worked for Cardiff City. And according to every report on such conversations, and there were many, with others describing women in a most un-feminist type terminology, with phrases like ‘the rack on that!’ and ‘well I would!!!’ and ‘not even with yours, mate’ being banded around like it was still 2013 or such dark ages. Because now we know better. That’s what the writers said. ‘People don’t use such racist, derisory, derogatory inflammatory terms any longer, now we’re all very PC and right on and equality rules the nation’.

Well oddly, I disagree. Conversations with ‘blokes’ simply do not adhere to any rules or structure other than ‘make him laugh, preferably as cheaply as possible’. And racism, sexism and virtually any other -ism will do the trick every time. And if they don’t, start on nob jokes.

So the moral indignation and righteous disgust at these two footballing stalwarts being engaged in ‘banter’ of a nature which flies in the face of all modern standards of acceptability is really just a load of total bollocks or otherwise complete naivety and ignorance of how people (errr, well, ‘men’) behave when alone and unmonitored. Because we are vile, evil, horrible, and perpetrate every variety of knuckle-dragging -ism that is possible to use. Those very same journalists are not monks. They don’t spend their lives writing columns of condemnation, they also go down the pub and joke with their mates, sometimes objectifying women or using quasi-racist expressions, even if used ‘ironically’. Go on; tell me otherwise and I’ll show you a liar.

And so we’re faced with a problem not of two men behaving very badly but with a problem of someone making a private conversation public and thus accountable. And another of how to then react to people who hold seemingly awful views WHILST IN PRIVATE after its made public.

I fucking hate hypocrites. More than I hate people who use racist or sexist terminology in a non-offensive way. Yes, it can be non-offensive, but that can only be viewed on ground level and not from up on a high horse. Bloody poofs.

And in fact I’d like to thank both Iain Moody and Malky Mackay for producing the kind of footballing stories that are re-kindling my love for the game (like that was ever going to take long, especially after Spurs beating both West Ham and the mighty Limasol in one week), because much as I love the game, its the peripheral shit and the politics that’s really wonderful.

Balotelli at Liverpool; but only if he promises not to bite anyone and to be a very good boy. Yeah. Gonna happen. Like asking Gazza to promise sobriety.

Happy Saturday

A xxxxx