First Diana Abbott malfunctioned when asked 2 weeks ago about police numbers and costing. She had no clue. Started mumbling and conjuring figures out of thin air on the Nick Ferrari show. “Errrr… that’ll cost… errrr… just a minute… YES, 300,000 a year”. So that’s paying policemen £30 a year each then? enquired Ferrari. “Oh… errrr… wait a sec… errrr…” and on it went. Her brain was subject to cutbacks and redundancies which left it weak and vulnerable to cyber-attack by the Chinese or Russians, or even by Alexa in my kitchen. Not that I’d have that woman in my kitchen. Its against the rules; anyone who’s ever shagged Jeremy Corbyn; banned for life. Rule 364/AJVE/7772389:g.

Then BA malfunctioned on Saturday. Big time. And although ‘computer crash’ is way better than ‘plane crash’, it doesn’t feel like that at the time when you’re 15 hours at Terminal 5 without water or food or any information whatsoever. The CEO said later that they could have done better perhaps with getting in touch. No shit. Perhaps used social media, blah, blah, blah. Here’s an idea: how about a n’announcement?? Like a loud voice over some loud speaker system telling people what’s going on. You don’t need fucking snapchat when every you want to address is in the fucking room.

Then yesterday, Jeremy Corbyn himself malfunctioned. On the radio. Woman’s Hour, to be precise. He was telling the, presumably, women of Britain how every child would get free nursery school places under Labour, which is a great idea. Jezza is full of great ideas. Just not a clue how to pay for them. So Emma Barnett asked him: how much will this cost, Jeremy? And he turned into Diane Abbott without the wig. “Errrr… let me see… hmmm… errr… I’ll get back to you on that”. Don’t you know???? (Implication: YOU COME ON MY SHOW TO EXTOL THE VIRTUES OF FREE SCHOOLING FOR A MILLION-PLUS KIDS AND YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH IT COSTS???? YOU TOSSERRRRR).

And that’s when it got nasty. Not on the show, they just moved on. But the ‘real’ Cobynites came out of the woodwork and onto their twitter feeds. Suddenly, Emma has become a ‘Zionist bitch’, a ‘Zionist shill’, whatever one o’them might be, and lots of other really pleasant comments, obviously coming from the many, not just the few.

I don’t mind a bit of banter, I don’t mind if they’d called her a slag, a bitch, whatever. And I’m not sensitive to anti-semitic bollocks. But what actually irked me is that the term ‘zionist’ is now, in these people’s feeble minds, an insult. As if calling someone that is the worst thing they could think of.

Once again the long, deep shadow of anti-semitism follows Corbyn wherever he goes. Whereas the brightness of simple mathematics left him years ago.

Happy Wednesday

A xxxx