So we need to mask up. Everywhere. Essential. Critical for the ‘R’ number. In shops, on transport, in bed, showering, masking up is compulsory. Even though Boris, as the end product of countless advisors and think tanks and medical gurus, has been telling us since… since March 23rd, that masks are shit. That they make us look like obsessive-compulsive-neurotic far-Eastern pro-democracy demonstrators. Or defeated U.S. presidents engaged in a series of U-turns. That masks ‘don’t make any difference’. Which is logical, for a breath-based, airborne virus. It’s like saying that shoes won’t necessarily protect your feet. Yet in the absence of even 1, single, measly reason why masks might do any harm to anyone, they are now to be part of our daily lives. Even though us tube travellers are hardened veterans. In that every day that I use the Underground I deploy mine around my neck. I sometimes pull it up but then it ends up dropped again due to a distinct lack of anyone I might breathe on. And if anyone does dare step onto my carriage, fuck ‘em. I hate wearing the thing. And it makes Joey cry, so its simply out of the equation. But you don’t HAVE to wear them in shops and stuff until 6 weeks next Thursday. Or nine weeks from last Tuesday. No rush.

Meanwhile, Spurs go marching on. Following our ‘thrashing’ of Arsenal on Sunday, we put poor Newcastle to the sword last night at St James’s. Which means our hopes and dreams of… of… of a UEFA cup slot next year are still burning as brightly as they were when… when… errrrr… when it actually was a decent cup to be involved in. Arsenal beat the new champions last night when Liverpool visited the Emirates, mainly because when you’ve already won the league, who can be arsed? Not Liverpool, apparently.

Manchester City won in not such convincing style against Bournemouth as they prepare for next season. As they’ve now been freed by those all powerful (don’t make me laugh), super-controlling (like Joey) omnipotent (right) tossers at UEFA to spend, spend, spend, they’re looking to go shopping again. Lock up yer centre backs. Because replacing the retiring David Silva is nigh on impossible, as he demonstrated yet again last night, but winning the league with Otamendi and John Stones as your centre back partnership is a far more unlikely scenario. And the court ruling has just open the door for yet more Emirate excesses. Just what the game needs.

Happy Thursday

A xxxx