I went out for dinner last night. I’m an omnivore. I can even do ‘vegetarian’, if I have to. And if it’s at Bubala, I don’t even complain. But it wasn’t about me. We were going out with me mate Mark. And he’s a different kettle of lettuce leaves altogether. Mark eats meat. Ok, he also eats… beef… errrrr… lamb… Ah!, chicken. That’s not meat. Sometimes even fish!!! Definitely not meat. When he went on a cruise round the Far East he sent me a photo. Ah, I thought, this will be Angkor Wat, the fabulous old temple in Cambodia. It wasn’t. It was a steak. Massive one. On the ship. When he sailed round Patagonia, I received no pics of icebergs, just meat. There’s no point getting off the ship for wonders of geology or fabulous historical artefacts when there’s so much meat to eat.

So we went to a local Turkish last night. Where we ordered a trough of meat. All fabulously charred from its short but meaningful life on an ocakbasi. It came with a gorgeous salad, which I ate. Other than half a piece of shredded red cabbage which was 4 of Mark’s ‘5 a day’. We had some chips, which was the 5th. And rice. But that doesn’t count. Chilli sauce, by my reckoning, made that 6!!! A bumper day for vegetables and vitamins. Oh, the meat was ok too. And we finished it. In case there was any doubt.

No doubts in the football yesterday. Spurs went to Elland Road and beat Leeds for their first home defeat in over a year. Welcome to the Premiership, Leeds. It was as convincing as all Spurs wins. Meaning: we won. Thank God. Arsenal also won, taking them top of the league as Liverpool lost their third match in a row. The first time that’s happened since 1853. Well, it feels like it. But in worse news, it was Chelsea who beat them. And no-one wants that. Manchester United won, which is terrible for the bookies as no-one ever expects them to win. And City beat Brentford who created a whole bus depot to try and ‘keep them out’, but no-one told them that Erling Haaland eats buses for breakfast.

Spurs are third. Just ‘where we want to be’. Because Liverpool are obviously a spent force now and Arsenal are on the verge of a total collapse. Why? Because I believe in the power of good over evil and in justice. Yin and yang. Astrology. Any fucking thing that works.

Happy Sunday

A xxxx