Southampton beat Sunderland, eight to soddin’ nil
that’s a score indeed, magnificent total thrill
(unless of course, Gus Poyet is your name,
in which case, never mind, what a bloody shame)

And Chelsea just keep rolling on, vile though they are,
but just too good for everyone else, Fabregas again the star

They put lowly Palace to the sword, even without Diego Costa,
who got banged up playing for Spain, got taken off the roster

Morihno’s pissed, quel surprise, for losing the prodigal son
The Brazillian Spanish traitor has been his major big gun

But I shed no tears for the boys in Blue, they have many in their ranks
I save my sorrow for my beloved Spurs, who play like total w-ubbish

We can’t defend, we can’t hold the ball, we fail to score more than one
we give the ball away eagerly, miss passes all the time, and foul just for fun

Without Lloris we’d be bottom of the league, he’s the only one to stop the rot
We can’t even score from 12 yards out with the ball on the fucking spot.

I’ve given them their time, their chances one and all,
let them settle, be very patient, more time on the ball

But 100 million quid we spent, on players from wide and far
and all they do is fall to the ground and hit the bleeding bar

Well, middle of the table, eight games in, ain’t so very bad
but once more aspirations shot down at the bastard Etihad.

Don’t talk to me about West Ham, evil little thugs
4th in the league, won’t last long, but maybe its time for drugs.

Arsenal once again come up late in a match they failed to win
in a home game against Hull, gave 2 points away, just threw them in the bin

But the Arse aren’t my problem, they’ll get there in the end
its Franco fucking Baldini who drives me round the bend

Our ‘director of football’; what does that even mean?
Ahhh, but he has a plan, a devious little scheme

He’s like a ‘youth opportunities programme’ for Europe’s orphaned dross
100 million wasted and he couldn’t give a toss

If he chose those players, disasters one and all
why is it the managers consistently take the fall?

He should be removed from his post, chained to a wall
ceremonially beheaded, disembowelled by one and all.

And on that cheery note, the season carries forth
now our team has come back from the north.

Happy sunday

A xxxx