So on Monday night, the start of Passover, when all good Jews were celebrating our redemption from slavery back in Egypt (reparation demands to follow), our duly elected members of parliament, and our duly appointed Lordy types next door, were embroiled in a game of ‘ping pong’. Not sure that God approves whilst he’s waiting to hear Joey ask ‘the four questions’ but this is what they call the ‘endgame’ of a highly contentious law that needs to be passed but keeps stumbling at the last. So they send it back and forth between the houses of parliament and the Lords to iron out the minor discrepancies and last minute changes and amendments needed to keep everyone happy. Or at least, less miserable. And on Monday night it was about… Rwanda!!! Again. And finally. As its now been passed. Amen. From now on, they’re going to stop those dinghies 5 miles from Dover and tow them all the way to East Africa.

Were that to happen, the boats will still come. And come. And come. As it happens, it probably won’t happen like that. The refugees will spill out onto our beaches, like before, gasping for breath, not because they’ve been in the water but because they’ve been on a boat made for 20 people and there’s 97 of them.

They’ll then get frog-marched, under armed guard, to the Premiere Inn. Its the only way anyone is ever prepared to go to a Premiere Inn. Where the migrants can be heard screaming to be taken back to war-torn Syria, to be returned to Albanian torture-chambers, ANYTHING but the Premiere Inn. And from there they’ll be shipped ‘straight to Rwanda’. Once each has appointed 3 different lawyers to fight for each and every one of them, all the way to the European Court of Human Rights, to avoid deportation. A process taking no longer than 46 months, no shorter than 45.

THEN they’ll go to Rwanda. Which, apparently, is a really beautiful country. Its politically stable, economically viable (even without the endless millions that Rishi has thrown at it) and just a great place. As told to me by someone who has been many times. Mainly because he’s a political journalist and has been covering this story for years and years. Its so nice that they might threaten badly behaving migrants with being sent back to Britain.

The problem is not the people who arrive here in those terrible boats. They are, for one reason or another, truly the world’s desperate. The problem is those who put them on the boats. Yet we can’t take ‘everybody’. We simply don’t have the room nor the resources. I’m glad I don’t have to decide who stays.

Happy Passover

A xxxx