I read the news today, oh boy. Sorry: I read the news when I can. If the wifi is working properly, rather than its normal, Caribbean-meantime, ahriiit-mon style, like everything else, I can get the Times. If not I can struggle through some BBC pages. But its Christmas, hence news is in fairly short supply. The Queen giving a speech is not really ‘news’ as such, in fact its very ‘olds’. Even Brexit-bollocks is temporarily suspended for the duration.

Thank Gawd for the football. That’s all I can say. As at so many other times in my life (approximately 9 times each week), thank gawd for the football. But only cos we’re winning. And winning big. And creating goalscoring records. Which is a bit like winning trophies, but without the trophy.

Liverpool have paid 75 million quid for Virgil Van Djiik, the Southampton defender. As if he alone can shore up the most porous defence that doesn’t belong to West Ham. Maybe he will. But how far have we come from the old (there have been so many) Real Madrid manager who famously said ‘we don’t pay big money for defenders’ after he paid 38 million for Zidane followed by 48 million for Luis Figo. Score enough goals; who needs defence?

Everyone needs defence. Morinho’s moan of the week, which always happens when his teams fail to win, as they have twice in the last few days, is that Manchester City spend ‘striker money’ on full-backs. Which they do. Therefore, his 300 million spend during his 18 months at Old Trafford he sees as pitifully insufficient. And he needs more. Who he’s going to buy I have no idea, but it won’t be Harry Kane. He can fuck off. He paid 75 mil for Lukaku. Who can indeed score a few goals. But who, in general footballing terms, ain’t fit to clean Harry’s shoes. His first touch can be somewhat industrial, hold-up play very so-so and other than sticking his foot out goalwards, he don’t do much. Pogba is indeed a class act. But like so many, is falling into that part-time player, part-time patient role which is another big problem after spending nearly 70 million on him too. So Jose is basically bemoaning the fact that he made some wrong choices. But this translates from his native Portuguese as: its everyone else’s fault, not mine, so give me more money to piss away on more underperforming almost-Galacticos so that we might be able to beat Burnley at home or Leicester away. As any ‘big club’ should do. Although his re-defining of what exactly constitutes a ‘big club’ and why is another doctoral thesis all by itself.

Suffice to say; Spurs scored 8 this week and Man United didn’t.

Come on Palace

A xxxx