On average a baby is awake for 12 hours a day. Yet it takes approximately 49 adult hours to cope with it. How is that possible? They’re only small. They don’t run away, don’t eat much so what’s the problem?

The main problem is, as we found last night when Lila once again came with her mummy for a sleepover, that every action needs three careful and cautious adults. Two to change the baby, bath the baby, move the baby, and one to watch. Preferably just to stare but photography is allowed by the starer. As long as its limited to short times so as not to detract from the staring, as that could endanger the baby.

Lila doesn’t have any hobbies yet, other than football, obviously. So she just kind’a lies there or sits there, or is held there, just kind’a… being Lila. Its a full-time job. Which involves wriggling, kicking, making funny noises, doing her own staring (she’s learned that from true masters) and ‘learning her environment’. Although I tested her to she what she’d learned so far and she didn’t do very well. Couldn’t even hold the pen to write her name. Little disappointing. I thought she’d be doing GCSEs by the time she was 1, university at 5, doctorate at 9, president of America by 14. One year older than the current president’s mental age.

Though her actual job is ‘growing’. That’s it. The entire description. ‘Get bigger’. And at that she is indeed a raging success. That milk is great stuff. But I’m not sure where it fits on the vegan scale. So while its not exactly ‘dairy’, one of the heinous crimes of veganism, it is emphatically ‘an animal product’. So I’m not sure if I approve. Even though I’m not a vegan. Though everyone else seems to be so I thought I’d better take notice.

David Haye, the boxer, finds nothing wrong with beating the living crap out of any man for a few million dollars, but feels uncomfortable for cows being milked. So he’s a vegan now. Morally correct. And veganism is becoming ever popular, even with its own restaurants. And you know what: I’d eat there. When we went to a vegan wedding in Israel the food was simply outstanding and wonderful. Not sure every vegan offering would be that good but I’d try. Because for me food is all about taste and texture. Not politics. For that I read the papers. Or eat the papers.

Vegans tend to be evangelical about it. Whereas carnivores don’t often post on Facebook images of raw meat or slaughterhouses.

Oh well, gotta go stare at my baby, I’m on duty.

Happy Thursday

A xxxx