The Premier League has 20 football teams. And after their 3 month hiatus, it would appear that only one of those can actually remember how to play. Manchester (fucking) City!

As a minor ‘aside’, Manchester City is owned by various Emirates. Sheikh Mansoor is the nominal ‘chairman’ of the club, which he funds in the usual excessive and corrupt (subject to an appeal with UEFA) manner. I just happened upon an interesting article the other day about his brother/half-brother/step-brother, another Sheikh, obvs, and also not a poor man. So not poor that he keeps 35 houses around the world, palaces really, including one in a home county shire here. Which is a massive estate with a full time staff of about 45 people. And he has never, in the 5 years he’s owned it, spent a night there. He has visited. For, like, lunch. Probably a big lunch; I’d reckon a spring lamb, in various kebabs and casseroles, some really fab breads, definitely hummus and a nice salad for the gels. Or his ‘wives’ as they probably are. Certainly chilli would be involved. Shame I missed it. Anyway, this Sheikh is suing his property management company for untold millions they’ve fleeced him out of for their services. In running his properties. Which he never goes to. Now, I’m not saying its wrong to own multiple homes in multiple countries or even suggesting that such domiciles might even be put to better use if someone else owned them who might actually live in one. I make no judgments. Not even of fat, white-robed oil billionaires who’ve never done a day’s honest work in their lives and whose obscene expenditure is grotesque, whether it be involved in residential property or MY FOOTBALL LEAGUE!!!!

Just an aside.

I’ve watched several matches these last few days. Like a shipwreck victim after 34 days floating on the sea, suddenly faced with a mediaeval feast of food and drink.

Only to find that the food’s kind’a gone off a bit. Flavours are wrong. Lamb’s a bit too chewy, hummus gritty, chilli tastes like dog’s piss.

Because its not been great. In fact, its been dire. Other than Manchester City. Who, combined with the glaring inadequacies of David Luiz, thrashed Arsenal last week. Then committed a virtual crime against Burnley on Sunday. Though following their ‘white lives matter’ banner, Burnley deserved a crime against them.

Liverpool were shit. Spurs against Manchester United only woke up in very small doses and every other game was a thrilling 0-0 draw. Though the (virtual) crowds really seemed to enjoy them all.

But then came last night. Oh my, last night. Spurs played (the hateful) West Ham. And if I’m brutally honest, it was not the best match I’ve ever seen. Possibly not in the top 2000. It was almost a reason for inventing the word ‘grim’. Not without excitement. As only the ridiculous, the pedantic, the totally stupid VAR can produce. But then we won.

And now I love football again. It’s that simple, I’m that pathetic. 2-nil. Felt like the best thing ever. Leaving West Ham and their stolen stadium perilously close to relegation. David Moyes didn’t look happy. David Moyes has never ever looked happy in any situation. Even the birth of his second child was reviewed on VAR.

Happy very hot Day

A xxxx