what a fabulous word: palpable. It means ‘touchable’ but is only used for things you can’t actually touch. Anger. Fear. Desire. Or relief. So really it means ‘almost touchable’. Who gives a shit. My contempt for that word is palpable.

But we use the word most often for relief.
And what is the most common cause of the frustration that demands relief? Air travel (I was so relieved to get home after 72 hours fucking about in airports and waiting for flights/taxis/passport control I nearly shagged the fucking cat).
An end to constipation. (no example required I feel, in the interests of decency)
Passing an exam.
Your children passing an exam.
Or football.

The magnitude of relief (or disappointment) at the end of a particularly harrowing football match is seldom matched anywhere else in the real world.
Because football is not the real world. Its far more important than that. More important than anything.

At the end of the Spurs match at Sunderland last night, which we ‘enjoyed’ on our tv screens rather than trek 300 miles into the godforsaken wastelands of the arctic northeast, the relief was palpable.

I received 2 texts, almost simultaneously, both containing exactly the same three words. They said: “never in doubt”.

Which is Spurs-ironic for saying ‘that was the most painful, agonising, frustrating, pathetic, inept, hapless, hopeless, hide-behind-the-fucking-sofa, agonising, horrendous 20 minutes of football I’ve ever had to endure.
Since the last Spurs game anyway.

The Times today described ‘stylish Spurs’. They must have been watching a different game to me. Although we were ‘stylish’ but only in our own half and a bit into theirs. Then we stopped the style and turned up the agony.
We were 2-1 up and one more goal would have just made it comfortable, watchable, nice, friendly, cheery, a bit pre-christmassy, but no. We instead went into ‘squander’ mode and pissed away 96 chances to ease the fans’ agony and torment.

The relief on Andre Villas Boas face went even beyond mere palpable and into the realms of job security and a future career.

But heh, we won. Which is more than Chelsea could do at mighty(?) Stoke, more than Manchester City could manage at Southampton and hopefully more than Arsenal can do today against Everton. Hopefully. Another interesting word; hopeful. One so often the death of expectation and joy.

Where’s it written in my ‘Tottenham til I die’ handbook that I must be tortured regularly?

Have a palpable Sunday

A xxxx