Look, I know it happened on Sunday and now its Tuesday but Monday was just a blur so now we have the opportunity to sit back, with the fullness of hindsight, history and… something beginning with ‘h’… hamazingness, and consider the meaning of life, the universe and everything, as represented by the simple equation: Spurs 2; Arsenal 1. Ok, so its not an equation. If you want one, have this: Spurs 2; Arsenal 1 = Joy + Happiness + Fabulous + Love.

Joey watched it. He’ll never forget the day. Oh, he has already. Never mind there will (possibly, hopefully) be plenty more. And its not like one match has defined the season or made life worth living again or re-kindled my love of football or anything profound like that, its more… more… just the best result. Further enhanced by the fact that it took us above Arsenal in the league table. And we came back from a 1 goal deficit to win.

But this is not about gloating. Never. Don’t do it. We leave that to ‘them’. Spurs fans only ever act like gentle-persons of not-necessarily binary nor any one specific coloured nature. All lives matter, even trans-thingies, Arsenal fans and poofs. So we don’t do that smug thing and we don’t get all arrogant. We just sit back, smile knowingly and shout NAAH NAAH NA-NAAH NAAH, at any nearly Gooners. We’re above that.

A bit like Manchester City. They’re a bit above the law. The law states: (eh-hum): you are not allowed to fund a football club like its your own, personal fiefdom, pumping it so full of cash which is NOT EARNED BY THE CLUB ITSELF that it makes competition impossible, irrelevant and reduces that club, or what’s left of it, into an oil billionaire’s plaything. (For Chelsea please replace ‘oil billionaire’ with ‘gas and airline billionaire’).

The governing body in Europe, UEFuckingA, for once took action against flagrant breaches of all financial rules by Manchester City, over a sustained period. Oddly, that same period in which they seemed to win everything. And UEFA punished them with a 2-year Champions League ban and a 50 mil fine. Damaging their finances and their reputation. And putting at risk their ability to keep hold of their (horrible, mercenary, self-centred, disloyal… shall I go on?) players and management team, who would run away without having European competition. Yet on appeal, this ‘sentence’ was reduced to no ban from Europe’s biggest tournament and a 10 million Euro fine instead of 50.

And why? There’s only two alternatives.

Firstly, that Sheikh Mansoor bought the entire UEFA team the Mercedes of their choice, and a garage to go with it. Attached to a villa. No accusations, I’m just putting it out there. I mean, footballing government and bribery has a deep and horrible history.

Or secondly, UEFA are just a limp and testicle-free bunch of absolute, useless and clueless tossers who know as much about football as they do about wearing face masks in a pandemic. Oh, sorry, that’s the other bunch of useless tossers, our government.

Tragic mistake, whatever happened.

Happy nearly face-mask day

A xxxx