I feel sorry for Muslims. Because Islamophobia is real and it’s common. And like all phobias, it’s not particularly rational. Britain, along with all ‘patriotic’ nations, especially ones filled with white people, houses more than its fair share of xenophobes. And you can’t do anything about it. Its inbred, its ‘hereditary’, its learned and its so deeply entrenched that you really can do very little to change it. Which is why the Farages and the Tommy Robinsons play on this in ‘middle Britain’ because we always need scapegoats and forriners present the easiest target. Can’t get yer kid into a school? Blame the immigrants. NHS waiting lists? Boat people, innit, all with sprained ankles from jumpin’ off the boats, cloggin’ up the A&E. But that’s all ‘people of colour’, whereas Muslims present a special case.

In my mind there are two types of Muslims. There’s the rotten, evil Islamist terrorists, intent on death, destruction, intent on taking over the entire world into a Muslim state, something like Iran. And then there’s the vast majority who are just Muslims because they were born Muslim and adhere to some or all of their cultural or religious customs. A bit like me being a Jew. I do the bits I like. Ok, which doesn’t involve praying very much, but does involve chopped liver and haimishe cucumbers (they’re pickled, but the Polish way; buy them, they’re life-changing, made by Mrs Elswood and available on this site!!!, just send cash).

So these Muslims are the people you work with, the ones who’s kids go to your kids’ school, the ones who give up their seat for you on the tube because they think YOU’RE OLD!! They’re just normal people who happen to be Muslims. And their lives have been tainted by the actions of the ‘other lot’, the jihadi lunatics. What the Farages and Robinsons of this world do is blur the boundaries. A Muslim’s a Muslim, make the presumption of terrorism unless they prove otherwise. Whereas I, naively, possibly stupidly, just like Jesus Christ himself(!!), believe in the good in all men. Except the total motherfuckers, obviously.

And the other night, they had a ‘pray-in’ at Trafalgar Square. Mainly for the decent Muslims but they let Sadiq Kahn in so obviously tossers were allowed too. And they prayed. What else would you do at a Pray-in? Well, actually, it was Iftar, the prayers at the end on Ramadan days, so there’s food given out; that’s ’what else’. So all in good spirit. And the ‘believers’ all threw themselves on the floor as they do, facing Mecca, which happens to be the same direction as the London Stadium, so maybe they’re West Ham fans too. Then they got up, brushed off, and gave out food, even to the non-believers who were standing around the Square, probably thinking: free food!! WTF?

Nick Timothy, the shadow justice minister, then said, on Twitter (the go-to vehicle for out of line political comment) that such a thing is ‘an act of domination… and division’. Then he said its not appropriate to have a ‘male only thing’ going on publicly. Has he never been on a stag night? Or worse, a hen night. And really, I think Nick was seriously over-reacting there on the Square. People lying on the floor in vast numbers just doesn’t bother me. Its when they get up that I start to worry.

Happy Friday

A xxxx