I’m not the world’s best shopper. For clothes, I am absolutely the worst. But for food, I’m not so bad. Because I love food but would rather go around naked than try on 16 different shirts/trousers/socks. Food doesn’t need trying on. And because I moved, 37 years ago, from the deprived wilds of way out East to the gentrified and leafy suburbs of London’s northwest, our ‘local’ supermarket is Marks & Spencer’s food hall. We love it there. If we want a ‘bargain’ we have to cross the road to Waitrose. Ok, there’s a Tesco the size of Ipswich up the road at Brent Cross but its a 24 hour a day nightmare. We’re also blessed with the best really local supermarket 3 minutes on foot away, which sells everything the Turks can buy. Not the cheapest but they always have what you need, however obscure. ‘Do you have zataar paste? Not the powder, the paste, but the one with garlic and tahini?’ ‘Yeah, over there, next to the eggs with three yolks and the unicorn steaks’.

But no-one is ever that far from a ‘real’ supermarket in London. There’s always a Morrisons, Lidl, Asda somewhere a short drive away. I just wouldn’t know which direction to point the electric vehicle. Though I do for Aldi.

Possibly the cheapest and most downmarket of all. And yet brilliant. And the staff are always really nice and helpful. And pierced all over and covered in tattoos, but that’s an HR requirement. And we go there for drinks.

Because, f’rinstance, a 2-litre bottle of low-cal lemonade (yes, I don’t do ‘water’, so its for my health) in Waitrose is £1.75. In Aldi, 45p. How can anything be 45p? We buy Scotch there, because Aldi have their own distillery on Isla and its the best-kept and least-snobbish secret around that you can get a bottle of truly fab single-malt for £16.99. A truly fab ridiculous price. And apparently there’s lots of other bargain stuff there too, of the more edible rather than drinkable variety, but you have to rummage around for that. And as we came out with about 15 litres of liquids, that was sufficient on weight grounds alone to end the spree.

I love Aldi. And I’ve never seen Rishi Sunak there.

Happy Shopping

A xxxx