Having failed miserably to unravel the financial situation at Manchester City, trying to work out which of ‘Abu Dhabi Investments’, ‘the investment company of Abu Dhabi’, Dhabi Abu Investments Inc.’ and ‘nothing to do with Abu Dhabi investments for the purposes of football accounting, plc’, are anything to do with each other, we now have an interesting situation at Newcastle. Where new owner, Yasir al-Rumayyan and his ‘PIF’ (Saudi Arabian Public Investment Fund) have made an official and legally-binding declaration of total independence from the State of Saudi Arabia. Fair enough.

Yet in an American court, during the case about the LIV golfing tournament, that overly moneyed and obscenely extravagant Saudi event which has torn golf in two, it was declared that ‘Rumayyan and PIF are representatives of the Saudi government’. Because that way they don’t have to give evidence.

The legal term for this apparent duplicity is ‘slippery motherfuckas’. More often referred to as ‘can’t trust ‘em as far as you can fucking throw ‘em’.

Because if you can’t be honest in front of lawyers and judges, because it may become prejudicial to your intended money-laundering operations, then its a bad omen for the Premiere League, UEFA and FIFA who are the most stupid, gullible and corrupt organisations around.

This all looks good too for the Qatari bid for Manchester United. Another nation of impeccable moral standards and financial transparency. As long as those morals can be bought and the transparency hidden behind a curtain.

And I’m not saying that these problems are in any way uniquely associated with countries with human rights issues, where the inclusivity policy is conditional upon total compliance to a set of fucked up rules, where discrimination is state-sanctioned and where women are beaten daily as a matter of protocol and ‘good practice’. Not saying that at all.

I would talk about actual, like real football, like, played on a pitch and winners and (FUCKING!!!!) losers an’ stuff but, quite frankly, I don’t feel like it. I’m not feeling that particular vibe currently. No idea why. No idea why my alcohol consumption has quadrupled in the last 4 days either. Surely these can’t be connected???

Happy Sunday

A xxxx