As the football transfer window winds to a close, there are protests in London. I’m not sure of the connection there, but there must be; I don’t believe in coincidence. The protests are ‘allegedly’ about vaccinations and the ‘great Covid scam’ (if you can actually Adam-n-Eve that there are sufficient numbers of brain dead imbeciles to constitute a protest), and Extinction Rebellion’s annual fuck-up-the-traffic-fest. Neither specifically mentions Harry Kane, nor Ronaldo. But its all there. In the sub-text.

I’m sure that both Harry and Christiano have been vaccinated, its part of their contract, doubtlessly, so that’s one black mark. And they tend to fly around in private jets, so that’s the other. Personally, I think both groups of protesters are the same. They look the same. Smelly, tattooed, loud and violent. The Extinct Rebellers are slightly smellier but the anti-Vaxers worth keeping well away from. On Covid grounds. Which they believe doesn’t exist. The whole world’s been ‘havin a larf’. Right.

Christiano Ronaldo, the greatest… the bestest… the goal-scoriest… person ever to use more than a gallon of hair gel a week, everyone’s favourite Portuguezer, is moving from Juventus. To… Manchester. All week we’ve been reading how Man City crave the superstar, even though he’s really old, because let’s face it, if you need goals and you can’t afford Harry Kane, Ronaldo’s yer man. And Juve no longer want to pay him half a mil a WEEEK. Even though he’s undoubtedly brilliant. So that’s set then, going once, going twice, BANG, Ronaldo moves to Manchester UNITED???? United? Surely City? But no, United swooped in at the final moment and nicked the preening poseur back to the club where he learned the word ‘vanity’.

Real Madrid, meanwhile, are desperate to buy Killian Mbappe, the French wonder, from PSG. The latest offer is 170 million, but ‘only’ Euros. Phah. Wouldn’t get out of bad for that. Yet he’ll only move if PSG can get Erling Haaland from Dortmund. For I hate to imagine how much.

And if all that actually happens, this summer will have seen the transfers of Messi, Ronaldo, Mbappe and Haaland. Four of the top 5 strikers in the world.

The 5th is staying at Spurs. So fuck you!

Happy Saturday.

A xxxx