“Yesterday, in England, 274 people tested positive for Coronavirus…”

Ooooh, that’s up on last Tuesday, 29 less than Sunday, just above the average for the weeks with a ‘2’ in their dates…

We get this daily. Initially from dour governmentalists and health type people, now from the news presenter. And we look at the trends and the totals and the… important data.

And its all total bollocks.

274 tested positive. OUT OF HOW MANY?????

If they only tested 275 people then Houston, we have a problem. And Houston, like most of that God-forsaken state, does indeed have a big problem. Other than the President.

But if 274 tested positive out of 100,000, that’s rather different. Yet if they test 100k one day, 80k the next, 30k the day after and 120k the following week then its all irrelevant verging on totally meaningless. But no-one tells us ‘…out of xxxxx tests performed’. Because… errrr… because its of no use? Because we can’t handle the numbers?

Even Trump realised this when he stated that if too many people are testing positive we should do less tests. Yes, even a retarded sex-offender with an IQ smaller than the size of his quiff realised the abject stupidity of meaningless numbers, yet we’re presented with them daily as if… as if… as if our lives depended on them.

Statisticians have a lot to answer for. In fact, they have the square root of the difference between the second differential of the binomial expansion and the square on the hypotenuse, to answer for. Not just for the above but for the succession of ambiguous and meaningless numbers hurled at us over the last 2 months.

1,463 Coronavirus deaths in Wales, today. Holy shit!! But that doesn’t include (probably about 4,381) deaths in care homes ‘or the community’ but does include the man who was smashed to bits when hit by an express train. Because 6 weeks before he had tested positive for Covid 19.

I would say ‘go figure’ but quite frankly, they’re not up to the task.

Yesterday was the hottest day since Coronavirus began. That’s hot.

Happy FA Cup Final day (yes, I’d forgotten that almost-irrelevance too)

A xxxx