Politics is different over here. We really have no-one quite like Donald Trump. Well, thinking about it, there is no-one else anywhere quite like the Trumpster.

We have loud, screechy billionaire property magnates, we call them Alan Sugar. We have racists and bigots, we call them UKIP, or sometimes just ‘Wayne’. We have circus entertainers, clowns, comedians, but ours are actually funny. We have people with orange faces, OK, they’re normally women and married to footballers, or accompanying them to court for sex charges of some sort, but we have the odd orange man too. We have men with extravagant comb-overs, we call them ‘child-molesters’.

But we wouldn’t vote for any of the above. Never.

And yet America is falling over itself to put an insane and dangerous racist, misogynist xenophobe one big step closer to the White House.

“AAAAAHHMM GONNA MAKE AMEEEEEEERICCCCA GREAT AGAIN!!!!” he screeches at the caucuses. “WE’RE ALL GONNA BE SUCH WINNERS YOU’RE GONNA ATCHERLEY ASK ME TO LOSE A BIT… AND I’LL SAY NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!” He atcherley said that.

Tosser. As are all those who actually buy into such unsubstantiated drivel.

Though as if taking total control of the middle-American bible-belters isn’t sufficient for our Don, he also received an endorsement from David Duke. Former Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan. The ‘moderate right’ (or ‘moderate white’) and now the extreme. Trump refused to comment or reject the endorsement. Well, heh, a vote’s a vote, even when its from neo-nazi, right???

But Trump is the duck off whose back such things just slide off. Donald Duck. He is teflon man. And Americans are seemingly buying into his meaningless nonsense taken straight from some handbook on motivational speaking. All vim and vigour and no meaning or content.

“Shit!!!” thinks Bill Clinton, Barak Obama, George W Bush, Ronald Regan, George Washington, George (no ‘W’) Bush et al, “I never thought of making America great; how stupid am I? Missed opportunity there. Oh well…”

So instead of worrying about a megalomaniacal lunatic possibly becoming president of the world’s most powerful nation, I shall focus my attention on Upton Park. The Boleyn Ground. Tonight. 7.45. West Ham play Spurs. The biggest match EVERRRRRRRR. They all are now. I’m saying nothing. I’m too scared.

Happy MAKING BRITAIN GREAT day

A xxxx