Now this is proper snow. Its not two-and-a-half millimetres of ‘the wrong kind of snow’ which fucks up trains from Yarmouth to Inverness, its not just a ‘light scattering’ as we normally get for about 10 minutes before it melts. No. This is proper. This is close-the-schools, build-a-snowman, get yer sledge out, stay-at-home and don’t drive if you can avoid it, snow. The full Canadian. We have ‘red’ weather warnings. We don’t normally get past yellow. Even though the snow’s still white. And people don’t have a clue how to drive in the snow.

Coming up through Hampstead last night an Uber driver had stopped where he really shouldn’t have stopped, at the bottom of a snow-covered and icy hill, so he could pick someone up, blocking the road for all. But when he drove off he did so at about 8mph. Oh, careful. No, fucking ignorant. You need to maintain your momentum going up a hill in the snow/ice and that speed don’t do it. You drive as fast as you can til you start sliding. Then you enjoy that slide, do a couple of 360s, if its safe, then slow down a bit and you’re fine.

The snow didn’t stop the fun at Wembley last night. Spurs played their cup replay against Rochdale and won 6-1. The score is irrelevant, the game was irrelevant, the real ‘star’ of the show was the VAR. The Video Assistant Referee. And that bastard caused delays of 8 minutes during the whole game.

I don’t care that Lamela’s goal was deemed not to be a goal; we scored plenty. I don’t care that we won a penalty that the ref hadn’t given because the VAR showed it to be so. As we all know, only limp-wristed tossers, mentally-impaired whingers and serial child-molesters blame all the game’s ills on poor refereeing. The ‘normal’ among us accept refereeing decisions as just part of the game. And right or indeed wrong, it don’t waste 8 fucking minutes when you’re sitting in -4 degrees of blizzard and not being informed why and what the VAR hath spoken.

We don’t need VAR. Its only to appease low-life excuse-mongers desperate to keep their jobs. And those who think that VAR is some kind of ‘god’, some ‘absolute’ that is perfect and beyond question, are so wrong. It just gives the whingers something new to moan about and they’ll be constantly demanding to increase its scope, causing yet more delays.

Happy snowy Lila-day

A xxxx