We went to Beijing, we (that’s the ‘team UK’ we), put up with their zero-covid bollocks, we turned blind eyes to their human rights abuses, we forgot about their international hacking, Alexa-Huawei nonsense and we CONQUERED! Yep, it took just two rather intense weeks to show the world that here in the UK we bow to no nation when it comes to falling over on ice and snow. In the tradition of Eddie the Eagle, we showed levels of inability to stand up never previously dreamed of. Even the bobsleighs rolled over on that horrible, fake, Chinese ice. But then came the Curling. Ahhhhh, that’s a proper sport. Bowls on Ice. That is so amazingly skilful and precise that no other nation can play it. In fact, if you’re not a Scottish road sweeper, don’t even bother to start.

I must confess that I watched virtually nothing of this latest Winter Olympics. I find it rather unwatchable. Ok, 15 year-old Russian drug cheats capture one’s imagination for 5 minutes and her attempt to out-fall-over the Brits was some kind of poetic justice, otherwise, it left me cold. There is a pun there. Hardly worth mentioning. But then came the Curling. And it’s not just that we’re pretty good at it, not even that we have a fairly robust history in the sport. It’s just about Eve Muirhead. And that stare. The intense concentration as she lines up her… ball? Stone? Thing, before release. Those steely blue eyes fixed at you like looking down the barrel of a gun. Its the most wonderful stare since Queen’s Gambit, when she steepled her hands under her chin and stared. I’m into staring. I never even realised. I think its because you can delude yourself into believing she’s staring at YOU! Cos that’s what it feels like. Intense. Now I think I need my medication.

Who said ‘football fans never get rewarded?’ Oh, it was me. Well I take it back. This morning I went for my coffee and the ‘boys from Barcelona’ who love football, love Harry Kane and most of all, take great pleasure in laughing at my sad and sorry football team every sodding weekend, refused payment for my daily caffeine fix, in honour not of ‘the result’ but more, the nature of that result. Even though Pep is ‘one of their own’. Decent people. Would never happen in a Chelsea cafe.

Happy Monday

A xxxx