We survived Rio de Janeiro. I’ve got the t-shirt and everything. 5 days of paranoia and we left in one piece with our watches, money, cameras and phones still all in our possession. Against all the odds, if everyone is to be believed. We were even stopped, on our bikes, in the traffic the other day, just before ‘The Fall’ and warned by a beautiful older lady that we shouldn’t be wearing watches, even the cheap nasty ones we’d brought with us, and shouldn’t be carrying any bags, even if they just had water bottles in them. Too dangerous, she said, muggers can be anywhere, steal anything. Yeah, right, I’ll tai chi those bastards right up their favellas…

But it didn’t happen. Though everyone thinks it could.

We flew to Iguasu. Where they keep the falls. Not as in ‘The Fall’, that’s all healing, slowly but nicely, thanks for asking, but the falls. Waterfalls. Hundreds of them. In fact he most incredible waterfalls in the world. As judged by some world heritage organisation of waterfall people. And its not just he falls that are brilliant, its the whole national park in which they live. The forest is full of trees, big surprise, and animals. There’s these little sort of racoon/fox type things and you think ‘oh that’s so sweet with its stripey tail and pointy snout, oh and its got a baby one with him/her, ahhhhhhhh’, then ten minutes later you’ve seen three thousand of the scavanging fuckers around every dustbin and cafe and they’ve become a pest. How did that happen?

Salamanders. Great big, 3 feet long lizards. Amazing. Then monkeys, swinging through trees with babies on their backs. That is incredible. Fabulous birds, no idea what they were but just fabulous. Butterflies in a multitude of sizes and colours. And the sun shone and all was just perfect. Two hundred and seventy-five waterfalls here, with a new one under construction in Taiwan as we speak. Joking. They’re all linked by a river, coincidentally also called the Iguasu River.

But then, as luck would have it, last night was a full moon. So after dinner, an intrepid (read: clueless) group of explorers ventured forth back to the falls to see a true world exclusive. Lunar rainbows. I kid you not. Most amazing thing ever. The falls diffract the light, creating rainbows, so if the sun’s shining the water particles produce amazing rainbows. But the same thing happens at night, if its very clear (and it was) and if the moon is full and bright (like last night). And its a massive band of apparently white light arcing across the waterfall. Because its too dark to see the constituent colours. But just at the edges you can see just a hint of the colours.
I never knew such a thing coud exist. Though it did mean getting so close to the falls that we got drenched for the second time for the day. But it was worth it.

Rather than lose all my paranoia, instead I’ve just decided to keep it and replace its focus from the muggers of Rio to the snakes of Iguasu. I know they’re out there somewhere.

Happy Sunday/Monday/its all gone blurred

A xxxxx